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 A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)

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Kin, the adorable fox

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Age : 25
Localisation : Ontario, Canada
Registration date : 2007-10-22

PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Aug 11, 2009 5:26 pm

"I HAVE THE POWWAAAAAAH!"
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Wed Aug 12, 2009 5:33 am

-yawns- guess who left the wireless security codes open for a certain little foxie ^.^ kay gents, i wanna ask: who's everybodies favorite villian so far?
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Riolu

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Wed Aug 12, 2009 6:22 am

Don't really have a favorite villain but I like the dead dude. Just hope he and Skip might eventually get along. My other favorite is Sunny's character only because I'm biased. But the funniest one is definitely Kin!
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Kin, the adorable fox

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Number of posts : 583
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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Wed Aug 12, 2009 6:40 am

Yay, I'm funny!
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Wed Aug 12, 2009 2:56 pm

deadman will has fans? -GASP- Rawk!
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Fri Aug 14, 2009 3:28 pm

sorry...

seems like the first time i asked whether anyone thought he was good, nobody liked him.
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Aug 18, 2009 3:37 pm

Special A.B.A. bonus content:







this one was set to happen while nikole was out of town, but was removed because i wanted terry to be a 'pure' hero.

here it is in beta version for your enjoyment =^_^=:



"t-terry.... i want to ask you a favor...you can say no if you want but..." ember stammered, from the couch, unsure of how to ask her question

"ma petite, you have given me a home, and a bit of my past back, i would be honored to serve you." he answered, sitting sieza on the floor, relaxing.

"c-can you...."

"yes ma petite?"

"i won't ask you to have sex with me... but, just watching you... i'm having some serious tension right now and i need to let it out..." she said in a rush.

terry bowed very low, blushing slightly, "v-very well. order me, ma petite, and it shall be done."

ember bit her lip and paused, figuring out the phrasing, "terry makoto, i order you to sexually pleasure me until... i orgasm..."

he blushed a deeper shade of red and went to find the changing supplies. she raised an eyebrow, but he placed a finger to his lips, and she understood, laying down on the floor. he went to her, placing his burden next to her and slowly began to untape her diaper. the inside was wet, but not entirely from urine. he took a wipe, and gently cleaned her, and she jerked a little as it crossed the lips of her vagina. terry had her completely cleaned in a matter of minutes, and was at a loss as to pleasuring her.


"uh... how... how would you... prefer...?" he tried to ask.

ember blushed again and answered, "can you... lick, please?"

he spread ember's legs a bit more, and tucking his hair back, lowered his face to her crotch. slowly, he licked, from anus upward to her vagina, and upward again all the way to her belly button. she jerked and lifted up to meet him as he made the return trip downward, and he licked harder. it was too much and she tensed, he whispered into her ear, "hold it in, just a moment longer." and diapered her in seconds. she was nearly ready to cry from the pain of holding it in, but terry suddenly grabbed her and kissed her hard. she came just as their lips met and screamed silently into the kiss. by the time their lips parted, she was light headed and almost deliriously happy.

"thank you terry," she gasped, around the overwhelming orgasm.

"d-don't mention it," terry replied and sat down again.

ember sat up and placed a hand on terry's diaper, an erection obvious beneath the plastic.

"ma petite, don't..."

"terry makoto, i order you to... allow me to return the favor," she stated, matter-of-factly.

"no. i have no qualms about making you happy, but i will not make you an object of my lust. i have to refuse." he switched back to sitting sieza again, very placid.

"terry, the fact that you're getting an erection means that you're feeling tension too. i really don't mind and... it would make me happy if you'd let me."

terry blushed and stammered, "e-e-em..."

she grabbed him and wrestled him to the ground, and he didn't struggle, but just let her.

"ember please... i-i-i can't..." he whispered.

"just this once?" she tried her best to look sad when she asked.

terry nodded weakly. "j-just this once and then never again... and please, don't lick, i... don't want you to dirty yourself like that..."

ember slowly untaped terry's diaper and cleaned him, making his erection bigger, causing him to blush even more. she rediapered him, adding half a bottle of baby lotion, and began to rub.








This one was about deadman will, but was removed due to the fact that will, lacking blood, cannot go erect




that night, after the 'family' had gone to sleep, will lay on his mattress, thinking.
after a few minutes, he unzipped his pants, and pulled them off, revealing his diaper, darkly yellowed accross the front.
"i wonder..." he murmured, then spread his legs and placed his right hand midway down. he stroked slowly. building tempo, and causing the soaked gel to slide up and down his member. wincing, he placed his left hand over the right, and then squeezed his legs together, rocking a little, causing his diaper to make an audible sucking sound each time he did.
a tingling sensation traveled up his groin, and he gasped, his seed filling up the diaper, a small bit spilling out past the waistband.

he whispered to himself, "...well, that was fun, but now it begs some other questions..."




note: alpha version means the chicken scratch basics. beta means 'fixed up'. delta is the finalized material i post. and when i say gamma, it means perfect version, with added content. (several versions of evanessence were referred to by these...)
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Secret



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Registration date : 2009-07-28

PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Aug 25, 2009 2:35 am

I am sorry if this seems rude but, I was thinking of reading this story and I got up to about two or three pages and I got tired and went to do something, now that was like a month or two ago. I was wondering if you could sum up what the story is so far, and like a lil brief plot summary, like the back of a book/DVD would.

But from what I read it seemed pretty good, I didnt really quite understand the male protagonist at all though?
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Fri Oct 09, 2009 3:48 pm

=^_^=





Everything louder than everything else pt. 3

Inside my mind with just my madness (Behind these walls of stone...)


"Boogeyman's mental journal, entry number: 5,248"



"Woke up, couldn't move. AGAIN..."

"Corsica forgot to feed me this morning... Am VERY hungry."


"Theyre running tests on the new version of tesseract today. I'm scared witless. I guess it's a good thing i'm not in control anymore, otherwise I'd probably have checked myself into a looney-bin by now, or something."


"I'm sitting indian style inside my own head, Man this feels wierd."

"Hm? It's a flute, maybe I'll play for a little whi- OH! A BUTTERFLY!"

"Whoops..."

"Did I just get distracted in my own head?"

.
..
...

"EH!? Feeling nauseaous... Yuck! This stuff tastes terrible."

"I'm being 'force-fed'? Yes. Yes I am. AND It's illegal drugs... Damn you .... At least get the FDA to approve this..."




And thus boogeyman's thoughts flitter from one to the next, poor soul that he is...


But who is Edward Serpiente really?
Just a pawn of corsica?
A hero in his own way?
Or just another vagabond?


Even he doesn't know anymore.
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Mon Jan 25, 2010 7:38 pm

continuation of the freed/skip brawl




"Why should I? Murderer!" freed screamed back at him, lightning churning accross his body as he got angrier and angrier.

"I. Did. Not. Murder. Anyone." Skip said, stating each word with a growl.

"Remise à zéro de système d'ordre saint. le chaos effréné. ordres par l'intermédiaire de libérer!" Freed spat at him.
Skip's eyes widened and his body began to shake. Unable to speak, he looked at Freed, as his ice dissolved.
<"So, you remember now... good. My orders are to execute you for your crimes. My own preference is to carve you apart for them. What'll it be, half breed?"> Freed spoke in flawless, accentless french.
"Chiffrez le code L Omega, dégagement de quatre-vingts pour cent. variation blessante." skip whispered, also in french, his eyes darkening to an almost midnight blue.

<"say again?">

"Le Leviathan Installent!" skip roared, the muscles beneath his otter fur rippling and growing, until he stood twice as tall as Freed.
"oh chié...," Freed gasped.

-a short hour later-

"I spare you Freed of the Holy Order. I don't remember anything, and I like it that way. Leave me be." Skip spoke, an impressive feat considering his otter form.
He turned and walked away, His muscles shifting and spine shortening, he resembled a human once more.

Freed was left with his thoughts, "How? How is it that the fuuraiken failed to kill him?! No Gear is immune to the jinki..."

Skip coughed into his hand and blood sprayed through his fingers, "Faust... Gotta find Faust..."
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Jan 26, 2010 9:04 pm

=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=^_^=

A man in a blue kimono stood in corsica's office, two large folding fans stuck through the

waistband of his obi. "Another murder? who was it?!" Corsica turned from the window, looking

frantic.

The man, Anji Mito, rolled his eyes. "We weren't given any details, and if 'That Man'

doesn't know, then the IPF must be involved."


"God damnit!" corsica slammed a fist into the desktop, causing a half-nude boogeyman to

huddle behind one of the large chairs in the middle of the room, "why is it that the damn

group of vultures has to get into everything!"


Corsica growled low in his throat and ran toward the window, crossing his arms in front of

himself. The glass gave easily, shattering into dust as he hit it. His body tilted downward,

rushing to meet the ground. When all of a sudden he barked out something in latin and the

air behind him ignited, lengthening out into a long flickering red tail.



Corsica was on the prowl!
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Thu Mar 25, 2010 3:16 pm

Terry looked up in time to see a crimson rocket shoot by overhead, and hear a stream of distinctly american cursing

coming from it's center.

Ember paused beside him, eyeballing the spectacle as well, "what do you make of that?" she asked.

"I'm afraid to put anything to it, to be honest. If thats a person, he's in a class of his own. And if it's

something else, well..."

Ember changed the subject abruptly, "What was the purpose of coming out here again?"

"More allies, or at least an agreement that they won't jump in on his side," terry looked away, hiding his eyes

beneath his hat.

The two were in full armor trekking through the maze that was the north district, Terry had disguised himself as the

grey eyed mercenary again, the igniter on his wrist primed to fire at any moment.

"What do you mean?" Ember asked, moving around him to get a look at his face.


"The Mob, as the basilisk I ... have an agreement with them. They don't venture down to where we're at and i don't

hunt them down like cattle."

Ember's eyes went wide, "Are you serious?"

Terry nodded, "It took a lot of doing... such as scaling thirty or so stories of skyscraper. And beheading the last

boss..."

"I'd been meaning to ask you about that, among other things," Ember gave him a one-armed hug, letting him know she

was still there.

"Well, we have a lot of time before we get there, ask away," He grinned at her.


"You've said your real name is Eirye, so, where did the name Terciel come from?"

Terry gave her an odd look, "I expected you to know that one, being the bookish girl and all. Terciel was the name

of of the rogue knight who assassinated the tyrant King Arthur and his advisor, Merlin the Black."


"I...do remember reading that, but i don't remember that name..."

"Guess I read an older version of the tale," he said, giggling, "I do know that he was able to wield two

broadswords, and like me, wore a white hooded cloak and almost no armor to speak of."


Ember was silent, digesting that for a moment, then she asked, "The basilisk... where did it come from? Like, is it

mental defense or..."

"I'm honestly not sure, sometimes when I fight it comes out and I lose control for a while, sometimes I have to call

it. I can be completely at peace and I'll go 'where are you' and--" his eyes went blank for a moment.

"I'd say that triggers it well enough," rasped a much older voice from somewhere deep inside him, "don't call me

again... Where are you?"

Terry shook his head and blinked several times, "What just happened?"

Ember tilted her head, "I think you just called it, and it wasn't happy about it."

Terry shook his head again and said, "Next question."


Ember took a moment to think about it, "Does killing bother you at all?"

"Quite a bit actually, but it's not my job to dwell on it, just to do it. After what happened to Beth I just pushed

forward, consequences be damned."
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Thu Apr 22, 2010 1:09 pm

So the two journeyed along, admiring the sights and bantering questions back and forth.

Until.....


CLICK! CLICK!

They had come to what appeared to be a theatre, and run into two men in business suits. Both carried peacemakers,

and terry let out a small chuckle as the two menaced their guns at him.


"BURN!," his grin split wide and red sparks flew from his left fist where it clenched around limelights handle, The

sword rattled and a gout of flame issued from the still closed case, nearly roasting the two mob men.

They immediately dropped their guns and shrieked, running off. Moments later, the theatre door opened and an man in

his thirties walked out blinking in the sunlight.


"hey, che cosa è la grande idea? posso sentirlo sciocchi sciocchi gridare tutto il senso…" he trailed off, and

suddenly broke into a laugh, "oh, esso sono voi!"


"in englischem Enzo wissen Sie, dass ich eine Markierung nicht vom Italiener spreche!"

"Oh, fine then, spoilsport." Enzo guffawed at terry, "you look ridiculous y'know."


"Looks mean little. Who's side are you on during the coming war?"


Enzo paused, frankly, a little bit shocked, "War? Oh god.... you didn't... not again..."


After a lengthier pause, he spoke softly, "you do realize we're a mob in name only... my people don't even mess in

the drug trades or fixing gambling anymore. we're no good at that stuff."

"Regardless, we either need you all on our side, or gone for the duration. I can't protect all of you if you stay

neutral." Terry intentionally didn't look at Enzo when he spoke.


"You think the damage will spread this far up?" Enzo shook as he spoke, betraying his rather cowardly nature.


"In a word, yes. I've seen only a fraction of corsica's power. he outstrips me, and it's going to take an entire

team to bring him down. I suspect he already knows about our agreement. As does dante..."

"H-how is the old scoundrel anyway?" he asked, trying to turn the conversation.
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Riolu

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Thu Apr 22, 2010 1:16 pm

Heheh, don't mess with the squish butt! Need an otter to convince him though? I'm sure if Skip were to bend a little urine he might make up his mind. Twisted Evil
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Thu Apr 22, 2010 1:22 pm

Riolu wrote:
Heheh, don't mess with the squish butt! Need an otter to convince him though? I'm sure if Skip were to bend a little urine he might make up his mind. Twisted Evil


skips in the hospital being treated by faust, remember =P
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Kin, the adorable fox

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Thu Apr 22, 2010 1:26 pm

terry wrote:
Riolu wrote:
Heheh, don't mess with the squish butt! Need an otter to convince him though? I'm sure if Skip were to bend a little urine he might make up his mind. Twisted Evil


skips in the hospital being treated by faust, remember =P

Kin could prolly make him laugh enough to do the same...X3
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Riolu

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Thu Apr 22, 2010 9:03 pm

Missed the hospital part. But Crinkle Bro is right, Kin could do the same practicing his phasing XD.
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Apr 27, 2010 1:17 pm

excerpt from the pristine forest spellbook page 134-88-G
regarding "the corinthian"


Full name: Ezekiel Wyngarde
Business name: Corinthian
Nickname(s): Don Corsica
Affiliation: Hero, specifically the "League"
age: unknown, presumed to be in early forties.
abilities: Devil's mirror. ocular ability that allows the user to copy
ANYTHING, be it powers, skills, looks, strengths, whatever.
Abilities absorbed (thus far): flame/ice/lightning/chaos/shadow/sound
manipulation. chameleon drive (shapeshifting)

skills: double jump, flight, twin blade, "Drive", and an assortment of martial
arts moves.
weapons: none. he relies on his powers most of the time.
class: Serei-2
relatives: Astor wyngarde (brother, currently alive)
Appearance:Eyes: solid blue, occasionally swirl with a red tinge
Hair: sandy brown
Height: roughly 6' 2"

assorted extra info: currently listed as a retired/reserve member in the
'league', the corinthian hung up his costume and
dissapeared from public view almost twenty years
prior to the events of A.B.A..

little did anyone know, he'd met ano-no-otoko and
had all of his illusions shattered. in an instant he
joined 'that man' and began work as his assistant in
'the city'.

He dislikes wraith for personal reasons, although he
almost never shows it.

Since his moral compass is busted, he has almost no
reservations about anything. Hence, the ultimate
evil. who, oddly believes himself to still be a hero.

due to his status as a reserve, and a private
request, the city is devoid of all other heroes, and
has become a cesspool for him to do with as he
pleases.

his history with terry is long and twisted, and only
he knows the full extent of it...
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Apr 27, 2010 1:40 pm

metahuman ranking system:

(from strongest to weakest) (each rank has the effects of the rank below it in addition to it's own, with the exception of aa, it's on its own entirely)

g.e.a.r.: on par with a serei 00. powers include metamorphism and
extreme evolutions of powers. i.e.: crystalized flames, tectonic
upheaval, 'the erasure incident'

serei 00: constantly evolving powers. there is presently one in the world of
a.b.a., he'll be written in eventually...
serei zero: a healing factor that deals with damage immediately, silver
hair, powers nearly always at max. check check and check.
this is terry's level when he's in basilisk mode.
serei-3: (in most cases, it's only attainable by one who who has either
ingested catalyst or taken it intravenously.) automatic boost of
powers to the next level, i.e.: blue fire, shaped lightning, stone
gaze, pain at a glance. 'frederick' is at this level until he enters
gear state
serei-2: enhanced strength, up to 500 lbs. (or more depending on the
meta)
serei-1: boosted healing factor, and near limitless stamina, pain
suppression factor and age supression factor. this is terry, when
the liquid chaos in his blood is shut off.
aa-class: e-branch level. enhanced mental powers, scrying, locating e.t.c.
a-class: ranged abilities and such. freed is at this level when he's not using
the fuuraiken.
b-class: this is strifes level. general tactile powers and low level
telekenetics.
s.e.e.d.: a meta potential. powers not awakened yet.

sometime soon i'm going to write in something called the heidrich effect. but here's the general idea...


discovered in 1970 by the german parapsychologist, E. heidrich. the heidrich effect refers to the the effect of a 'cape' or 'super' affecting the mental state of their adversary.

most often this refers to the way the cape itself seems to bend reality and wrap itself around the victim (even when it hasnt moved an inch XD) making them feel claustrophobic and generally scared shitless.

the more 'presence' the cape has, the heavier the effect.

this also works with cloaks and trench coats.


i came up with this walking home about a month ago and had to write it up.

nutty huh?
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Kin, the adorable fox

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Apr 27, 2010 1:48 pm

>w< Interesting!


What level am I?
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Apr 27, 2010 3:31 pm

Kin, the adorable fox wrote:


What level am I?

a-class, mainly due to your fighting skill.

however, with the zessen fans as a weapon, your level skyrockets to
serei-3 automatically.


unless you decide that kinny's hair suddenly has silver streaks.....
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Kin, the adorable fox

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Tue Apr 27, 2010 4:32 pm

Oh my, that makes me badass..kinda <3

Nawww, goldiehair is <3
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terry

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PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Wed Apr 28, 2010 2:53 pm

corsica's body began to change during his long flight. the blue of his eyes bled out into the rest of his body in thousands of arcane patterns, swirls, and eddies.

the crimson flames around him darkening in counterpoint and his breath caught in his throat.

he choked out several words in latin, and two slim blue blades shimmered into existence on his arms.

the blade on the right was blockier, heavy looking, and at the same time, etherial and translucent. whereas the blade on his left was long and slim and pulsed with a writhing st. andrews fire.

he reached up to his breast pockent and slapped the mp3 player there, causing it to turn on and start blaring black sabbath's "iron man".


he grinned through the blue glow around him, and slipped a small pill into his mouth.

almost immediately, the blue glow marks were surmounted by a sickly green hex pattern...


As you may have surmised, the pill was the new form of tesseract.


"can he see or is he blind?" corisca's voice wavered just a bit at first, clear evidence that the ethereal blades hurt when called up.

he began to drop, the rushing flames around him dimming so that the surrounded his armani shoes.

(somewhere in the back of his head was the thought 'armani on a slash and burn? i should have brought my wellingtons')


The first thing he saw as he landed was a group of soldiers in gray uniforms, there were two men standing nearby, one was a hefty man in his forties, wearing an ill fitting emerald green cloak.


The other had spiky silver hair and a moustache that had been greased into two slim points, his cloak was bright red and appeared to be wrapped around his waist.

(again there was a thought in the back of corsica's mind 'i bet that moustache gets radios signals!')

the one in red looked up as corsica approached. he glared and slammed his palms together, there was a loud crack and his arms were covered from the upper arm to the fingertips in heavy metallic gauntlets.

HE barked out, "Major Kimbly Tyrens, IPF! Stand the fuck down!"

corsica charged at him, tongue lolling out. "Die!"

"Hoped you'd say that." Kimbly slammed his gauntlets together and gasped in a lungful of air, immediately blowing out a massive fireball.

The fire didn't even faze corsica as he charged forward.

So, kimbly tried a different approach, he clapped his palms together and grabbed corsica. "detonation, five seconds," he grinned and ducked down.

where his hand had been was a livid red mark on corsica's shield.

"booooom" chortled corsica, "looks like your little fuses didn't work, did they?" With a grunt, He brought his right hand blade crashing down onto kimbly.

The blow knocked the agent out immediately, and corsica turned his attention to the green cloaked man who raised a badge and like his comrade redited, "Colonel Grey, IPF! Stand the fuck down!"

seeing corsica wasn't about to obey, he pulled a military issue rapier from his belt.

"a swOoOoOrdD?! yOOooOoou come at me with that piiiiiEeEece of shIiIit!?" he was frothing at the mouth, his veins bulging and glowing bright blue as well.

He launched himself forward and struck with his right hand blade driving it rapidly across the agent's guard, then slashed with the left hand blade leaving a trail of fire.

Grey didn't even have time to blink as corsica kicked him skyward, and launched a drive with his left blade, knocking him even further in the air.

corsica followed him up, stopping about twenty feet above, and launching a second drive with his left blade, intoning, "napalm death!"

His sword skills were obviously copied from Terry... or were they?

Grey righted himself, the air solidifying beneath his feet and corsica paused for a moment, his rational mind re-implementing itself "you're both metahumans... serei-1 at the least... then i have no choice..."

he dropped to the ground and slammed both blades together, "Totsuka..." he whispered, and the blue glow formed into the effigy of a face. All gnashing teeth and primal fury.

He doubled over coughing, and cluthing a stomach wound that hadn't been there a moment ago.

Grey stood behind him, two slim knives poking out from his sleeves, they gleamed the dull grey of lead...

Corsica roared and drove the blade into Grey's stomach, and pinning him to the wall of the building behind him.

He waited a moment, then walked up to make sure the man was dead.

"Buh-bye fucker," grey aimed a tiny pistol at corsica's forhead, and pulled the trigger.

The roar the miniature gun made was audible from five miles away, and reset many of the nearby VCR's.

Grey laughed, because a simple stomach wound wouldn't kill him, and watched corsica's half headless body stand there.

One of his hands went up to his missing face... his tongue flopping around in what remained, "---oookkkkkk daaaa essssshy --cker!" Bone and brain tissue began to immediately reform, skin and hair following swiftly.

"I said, not that easy, fucker!"

"What in god's name are you?" Grey asked, wishing the pistol had had more shots.

"I am the corinthian!",Corsica's jaw unhinged, and his teeth began to lengthen, as the primeval blue thing settled over his face, making him into a nightmare, "Eater of souls!"


Later that day, police would find a headless corpse. forensics would reveal that it's head had been bitten off, pieces at a time...


He licked the blood and gore from his lips and continued onward, pausing to pick up the gun, "A .50 caliber derringer? smells like extra gunpowder too... 'Door Knocker' what an... oddly appropriate name. I'll have to look into these..."


Inside the shack he found what he was looking for, the battered body of a woman, her neck twisted at an impossible angle. "wait... something smells wrong here."

A few more sniffs, and he flipped her over, "the tattoo, it's not there... She's using doppelgangers? or... Duplicates?"

He piucked up her hand, and drew a pen knife across one of the fingers, what leaked out wasn't blood, but something else. "An L.M.D., Did NOT see that coming."

"So that means she's still alive, but where? Can't believe i just wasted an hour and a half looking into a fake. Feh..."

He belched into his fist and making a funny face, spat out a piece of bone, "The fat one taste so good, but brain meat from them is definitely not a delicacy."
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Riolu

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Number of posts : 1610
Age : 26
Localisation : Attempting to keep Sai from driving Kyle insane.
Registration date : 2009-03-03

PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Wed Apr 28, 2010 9:51 pm

Ick. Corsica ish nasty.
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terry

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Number of posts : 807
Localisation : the deadzone
Registration date : 2007-07-12

PostSubject: Re: A.B.A. (comments and suggestions PLEASE)   Wed Apr 28, 2010 10:49 pm

Riolu wrote:
Ick. Corsica ish nasty.

i lived in his head for three days before this. trust me, this is soft-core for him...
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