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 Want to be in a story?

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Zee-Zee

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PostSubject: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 1:46 pm

Max did a really funny caption of my avatar yesterday, and it made me think of a silly little story about Zee-Zee being a detective and investigating a case of missing cookies at his daycare. It needs a supporting cast of babyfurs and caretakers, and I don't really want to write about people's fursonas without permission, so... if you'd like to be in the story, reply to this! Otherwise I'll just make characters up, and it'll be nothing but squirrels, because I'm not very imaginative...

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Lig
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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 2:05 pm

Welll Zee Zee feel free to use any of my characters in your story. Lig and Warren, Ben and Willy, Balt(my Balt. Not the guy from FTT. Mine's just a regular folf.), or Dylan my cabbit.

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Raikan

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 2:22 pm

Raikans heres aand ready. Feel free to use him, ya cute squirrel!!!
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Riku

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 2:37 pm

*jumps up and down* oh oh oh oh use me
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Incontinent Wolfhound
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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 6:57 pm

I am at your command! (Aragorn, the 3 year old version)

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Zee-Zee

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 7:21 pm

Thanks, guys! Here we go, it's called "Elementary!"

The whole thing is Zee-Zee’s daddy’s fault, really. Most fathers’ bedtime stories for their two-year-old sons are nursery rhymes, but Zed, a college professor with a love for the classics, likes to read the little squirrel the first book that he pulls from the bookshelf in an evening, and last night, it was Sherlock Holmes. So it’s only natural that Zee-Zee fell asleep half way through the story, dreamed that he was a great detective and still hadn’t quite remembered that he wasn’t, when the Mystery of the Stolen Cookies came up at snacktime at the daycare the next day.

“Okay,” said Raikan, with a frown. “Who took the box of cookies? It was in the kitchen cupboard yesterday afternoon.”

The cubs looked at each other. You didn’t have to be a mind-reader like Raikan to see that it had come as a complete surprise to everyone. “Well, I guess it wasn’t any of you,” Raikan mused to himself. “That’s strange. It must have been taken some time yesterday or today, but everyfur’s here today who was here yesterday, and nobody else has been in the building. Oh well, sorry kids, no cookies today. You’ll have to have fresh fruit and vegetables instead.”

Eww, yucky, was the general response to that. Zee-Zee jumped dramatically to his feet and announced “Don’t worry, Raikan! I’ll find the cookies! I am the world’s best detective, you know!”

“What? No you’we not!” said Prav, but Zee-Zee ignored him.

Raikan smiled at them as he sliced apples, oranges and carrots to make a tasty and nutritious snack. “Well,” he said, “if you can find them, you can all have a cookie as well as the fruit. Maybe even two cookies, as a special reward!”

Raikan handed out snacks and drinks to everyone. “Eww, cawwot sticks?” said Prav, unhappily. “I wanted a cookie!”

“I likes carrots ‘n’ stuff,” said Dylan the cabbit, nibbling on his snack. “I’s part rabbit.”

“Hmmmmmm,” said Zee-Zee suspiciously, taking a drink from his sippy cup in what he thought was a detectivey kind of way. “Where were you yesterday afternoon and this morning?”

“…Here?” said Dylan, confused.

“Hmm,” said Zee-Zee. “And you like carrots and stuff. Maybe you wanted everybody else to like carrots and stuff too, so you took the cookies to make us all get fruit instead!”

“I didn’t!” protested Dylan. “I don’t steal cookies! That’s mean!”

“Well, okay,” said Zee-Zee, “but I’ll be watching you. Come on, Prav, let’s go plan detective stuff in our secret base!”

“You mean behind the couch?” Prav asked.

“Yes, behind the couch,” said Zee-Zee, a little irritably.

In the secret base, Zee-Zee racked his brains, trying to remember what detectives do. “We couwd just ask evewyone if they took the cookies,” Prav suggested.

“No, you’ve got to be clever,” said Zee-Zee with authority. “You ask them about other stuff and they make a mistake and tell you they did it. That’s how detectives do it. And there’s other stuff they do too, I can’t remember… hey, why are you fidgetting like that? Did you wet your diaper?”

“No! Well, yes, but that’s not why,” said Prav, standing up. “I got cwumbs and stuff in my fuw!” He brushed his legs with his paw and looked down. They had been sitting on a piece of carpet covered with cookie crumbs.

“Aha!” exclaimed Zee-Zee. “That’s what detectives do! They find clues! This is a clue!”

“Like Bwue’s Cwues?” Prav asked.

“No, better than that! There’s cookie crumbs here! That means whoever stole the cookies took them here! So it must be someone who knows about our secret base!”

“Evewyone knows about ouw secwet base,” Prav pointed out. “It’s not weawwy a secwet.”

“Well, we gotta go look for more clues!” Zee-Zee said, excitedly. “I need a… um, one of those detective things you look through and it makes things look big. What are they called?”

“I dunno,” said Prav. “You’we supposed to be cwevew, how come you nevew know these things?”

“Never mind. It’s probably not called anything. It’s just called a detective thing. I’ll take my glasses off and look through one bit of those. That’ll work. Come on, let’s go!”

“We shouwd look at everyone’s wegs,” suggested Prav. “If they sat in the cwumbs, they’ll have cwumbs in theiw fuw too!”

“Good idea!” said Zee-Zee, wishing he’d thought of it. The two of them came out from behind the couch and looked around. “Hey, everyone!” Zee-Zee called out. “We’re just looking at legs, no reason, we’re not doing detective stuff now! (That’s so they don’t suspect anything.)” he added in a whisper to Prav.
They split up and tried to wander around the room nonchalently checking everybody’s fur for crumbs. Then Zee-Zee noticed someone hurrying out of the room. Putting his glasses back on (they really didn’t work as a magnifying glass), he chased after the cub, calling “Stop! I’m the police! No, I’m a detective, but you’re fleeing the scene of the crime! Come back!”

Aragorn stopped in the hallway, crossing his legs. “But I gotta go potty! Now!” he said.

“Do you expect me to believe that?” Zee-Zee asked. “Ooh, I gotta go too!”

“Me first!” said Aragorn, running into the bathroom and closing the door.

Zee-Zee hopped from foot to foot outside the door, wondering why Sherlock Holmes never had to go potty in the middle of a case, and deducing that the great detective must not be potty-trained yet. Prav came to join him.

“What awe ya doing out hewe?” he asked. “I found anothew cwue!”

“Really?” asked Zee-Zee, taking the scrap of cardboard Prav was holding out. In his excitement he forgot he was waiting to use the potty, and wet his pull-up.

“I found it in the kitchen,” Prav explained, “I think it’s a bit of the cookie box. Thewe’s a pictuwe of a cookie on it.”

“Hmmmm,” said Zee-Zee, annoyed that Prav was finding all the clues but trying not to show it. “So someone musta opened the box in the kitchen and took it to the secret base! Sneaky!”

The bathroom door opened and Aragorn came out. “All yours!” he said, with the happy whistle of a wolfhound who made it to the potty in time.

“Oh, right,” said Zee-Zee, realising that he’d had an accident. “Um, I’ll go and use the potty then. That’s what big squirrels do, you know. You wait there, Prav.” Convinced that his reputation as a potty-trained detective was intact, he went into the bathroom. But no sooner had he closed the door behind him than he called out “Prav! Come look!”

Prav scratched his head. “You want me to come wook at you going potty?”

“No!” yelled Zee-Zee. “It’s a clue!”

Prav came into the bathroom and saw Zee-Zee pointing excitedly at a cookie lying on the floor beside the toilet, saying “Look! Someone dropped a cookie! I thought it might be Aragorn, but it’s kinda dusty so it musta been here since yesterday! It musta fallen out of the cookie-thief’s pocket! You know what that means?”

“Can we eat the cookie?” Prav asked.

“Eww, no, it’s been on the floor! Near the potty! All night!” Zee-Zee said, appalled.

“It stiww wooks okay to me,” said Prav.

“Me too,” said Zee-Zee, after a moment’s thought. They broke the cookie in half and ate it. “But, you see, the cookie thief must be someone who uses the potty, like me!”

“You don’t use the potty,” said Prav, with a giggle, pointing at a wet spot on Zee-Zee’s shorts where his pull-up had leaked a little.

Zee-Zee decided to ignore that. “Come on, let’s go get changed. You’ll get a rash if you stay in that wet diaper too long, and I’ll come and keep you company. We can ask Raikan what he knows about the cookies while we’re there…”

They found Raikan in the changing room, changing Riku’s diaper. “How’s the detective work going, boys?” Raikan asked, with a smile.

“Great!” enthused Zee-Zee. “We found lotsa clues, and we’ve nearly solved the mystery!” He showed Raikan the clue that they hadn’t eaten, the scrap of cardboard.

“It’s fwom the box,” explained Prav. “And can you change my diapew, pwease?” he added with a blush.

“Me too,” said Zee-Zee quietly, before changing the subject. “It’s pink cardboard, with a picture of those cookies with the pink frosting on them.”

“Those are me’s favowites,” said Riku from the changing table. Then he blushed and shook his head. “No they’s not!”

“Hmmmmmm!” said Zee-Zee, taking off his glasses and examining Riku through one lens, looking for crumbs. “Then why did you say they were?”

Raikan set Riku down on the floor and picked Prav up for his change. Riku looked away guiltily. “Me no know,” he mumbled.

“Aha!” said Zee-Zee, triumphantly. “You took the cookies because they’re your favourites and now you’re denying it because you know I know you did it!”

“Huh?” said Riku, confused.

Raikan looked down at them with a friendly smile. “I think you’d better tell him, Riku,” he said.

Riku blushed, and opened his kimono to reveal his pink frilly diaper. “Me wikes pink things,” he said. “But it’s a secwet.”

“And he didn’t want you to know, so he pretended not to like the pink cookies,” explained Raikan. “There now, Prav’s all clean and dry, let’s get you out of that wet pull-up, mister detective.”

One change of training pants later, Zee-Zee called all the suspects into the playroom. Raikan, Dylan, Aragorn, Riku and Prav sat on the couch and watched him pace back and forth.

“I know what happened to the cookies!” he announced. “It was tricky, lotsa people acting suspicious. Dylan likes carrots, so I thought he might have stolen the cookies to make us all eat carrots too. But that doesn’t work, cause if we all had cookies then there’d be more carrots for him. And I thought Riku did it, cause he likes the pink cookies, but…”

“You pwomised not to tell!” protested Riku.

“Me likes pink cookies too,” said Dylan. “I don’t just like carrots!”

“Oh,” said Zee-Zee. “Well, you still didn’t do it, because the thief goes to the potty and you don’t. And neither does Riku. Aragorn does, and he was being suspicious and running away…”

“I really had to go!” said Aragorn.

“… but it wasn’t him either,” continued Zee-Zee, “cause he doesn’t like the pink cookies at all!”

“Nope, too girly,” Aragorn nodded.

“No,” Zee-Zee carried on, trying not to look too irritated by the interruptions. “The real cookie thief was…”

“Us,” said Prav, suddenly. Everyone turned to look at him in surprise. “Me and you. I just wemembewed. Yesterday, we were pwaying hide and seek and you hid in the kitchen cupboard and I found you and we both found the cookies thewe.”

“Oh yeah!” said Zee-Zee. “I forgot! And we took them and ate them in the secret base! And I went to the potty and one of them must’ve fallen out of my pocket! Oh, um, so, yes, it was us. But we solved the mystery, so we’re not in trouble, right?”

“Wrong,” said Raikan with a smile. “No more cookies for you two for the next week. You’d better learn to like carrot sticks! Okay, the mystery story’s over, everybody can run along and play. Except Zee and Prav. You two can get the broom and sweep up those crumbs behind the couch.”

And so the great detectives went back to their base, not completely happy with the way things had turned out. “I bet Sherlock Holmes never got in trouble for solving a mystery,” Zee-Zee grumbled.

“Hey,” Prav asked, “who were you going to say was the thief if you didn’t know it was us?”

“An invisible monster,” explained Zee-Zee with a shrug. “I thought it was the only possible solution.”

The end.

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Lig
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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 8:37 pm

LOL Razz Zee Zee I loved it! You did a great story. Hehehehhehee. And ya did a good job of capturing some of Dylan's personality.

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Incontinent Wolfhound
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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 9:17 pm

Ohhh! I loved it! Hehehe...

Quote :
The bathroom door opened and Aragorn came out. “All yours!” he said, with the happy whistle of a wolfhound who made it to the potty in time.

Awww, so funny. *huggles* You should write more stories like this, you're awesome!

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Lig
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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 9:23 pm

I agree with Aragon. Your good at writeing short stories. I might try my paw at some short ones.

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Riku

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Thu Jun 07, 2007 9:28 pm

hahahahahaha thats funny as hell ur realy good*hug zee zee*
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Prav

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:56 am

Ahh, busted! Drats.
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Zee-Zee

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 4:16 am

Heehee, thanks, everyone! I'm glad you liked it! Like I said, the whole story practically popped into my head all at once when I read Max's post. It just needed some more suspects, and it was really easy to think of 'motives' for all your characters. I've never written anything that flowed quite so naturally! If I get another idea like that, I'll write another one. Very Happy

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Maxis

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 6:21 am

Oh my God Zee Zee! This is so cool!! Sure as heck kicked the crud outta my story!! And to think, my post inspired it!! I belive this calls for a squee.

"SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

*hugs Zee Zee*

Can I be in your next stowy? Pweeeeeaaaaaaseee!!?"

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Zee-Zee

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 7:02 am

Heehee, of course you can! Thanks! (I feel bad about leaving you out now, I shoulda put you in it just to thank you for the inspiration. And I also tried to draw you yesterday to say thanks for drawing me, but it wouldn't come out right so I gave up...)

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Maxis

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 7:28 am

hehehe >////////<

funny you should mention drawing...see...I read your story and I couldnt resist:

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Zee-Zee

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 9:53 am

Squeeee! My first ever fanart! *huggles!* Thanks!

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Maxis

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:17 pm

*giggles and huggles back*

It was fun!

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Lig
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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:25 pm

Hehehehee. That was some nice fan art Max. Great stuff.

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Fri Jun 08, 2007 2:56 pm

you can if you do another story use my cxhars. had i known about this earlier i would have let you.
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Drake Silverscales

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PostSubject: Re: Want to be in a story?   Wed Jun 13, 2007 6:59 pm

oh i want to be in the storie, it would be fun to see Drake in one.
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