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 A reposting of an old story

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Poco

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Number of posts : 856
Localisation : High in the Rocky Mountains
Registration date : 2007-03-11

PostSubject: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:27 am

Okay, I originally posted this over at FTT this past winter, so you may have read it there. I thought I'd share it with the furs over here who maybe don't visit that forum. As a heads up: this story is pretty long (27 pages on my word processor) and was originally put up in four or five installments. This posting is all the chapters at once. Enjoy!
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Poco

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Number of posts : 856
Localisation : High in the Rocky Mountains
Registration date : 2007-03-11

PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:41 am

I clutched my slip nervously as I sat waiting for my name to be called. I was at the final
counseling appointment for what was to be the culmination of a multi-year ordeal that
would hopefully fulfill my lifelong dream. Reflecting, I was still amazed that this was
even possible. A decade ago I would have laughed to hear that anyone believed they
could change bodies as easily as plastic surgeons once changed noses, or breasts. Then
the New Reality Project announced a startling breakthrough. They would be growing
new bodies to order, cost: half a million dollars. It was astounding. The technology was
right there, no one had thought to market it. It employed genetics: decoded DNA, stem
cells, or some such things which I failed to understand at all. It didn't matter though, I
was getting a new body. My job paid well, but not enough that I could drop half a mil
just like that, so I started saving. I sold my house and moved into a one bedroom
apartment in a crummy part of town. I bought clothes at thrift shops and discount stores.
I ate mac and cheese or PB&J's for dinner (which wasn't too bad). My co.-workers
thought I was insane, living like a college student when I made six figures. There were
jokes about minimalism and anti-materialism. About becoming a Buddhist monk. I just
laughed and looked forward to leaving them all behind ASAP. As the technology grew
so did the culture around it. At first most of the people simply wanted to look like
another type of human. You had older people getting a young body. Transgendered
people getting a much more convincing sex change. People becoming more beautiful
then plastic surgery could ever hope for. But there were a steady trickle of others... Some
called it the "Second Life" effect. People becoming aliens, demons, and, like me,
animals. There was even a whole city of them, or I guess us, living in what was once
rural Montana, as far away from normal humans as possible. I planned to join them.

I was awoken from my reverie when the councilor called my name. She was a
big, older lady with a comforting smile. Almost like a grandmother. I was grateful for
that because I was nervous as hell. We went back to a private office where she sat behind
a computer and took my slip. "So honey, what do you want to be?" she asked looking at
me appraisingly. "Umm..." I stammered. I hadn't really expected her to be this direct.
"What?" she asked grinning, "I've heard it all hon. You ain't gonna shock me." This was
not very consoling, but she was right, I had to say it. "Well, it's sorta weird, " I began "It
always is!" she laughed "Just say it, I won't criticize." she pointed at a sign on the wall
bearing the motto of the New Reality Project: 'You Should Be What You Dream Of
Being.' "Okay, " I said "I want to be a mouse." I looked at her for any kind of reaction,
but all she did was smile at me. "Any particular kind of mouse?" she finally asked. I
reached into my bag and pulled out a drawing an artist friend of mine had done for me. It
was of a little white anthropomorphic mouse that was extremely close to my own self
image (it should be, I'd dictated it to him in detail). "Here, sorta like this." I said,
handing it to her. She seemed completely blasť about my having this for her and I got the
impression she'd been through all this many times before. She studied the picture for a
minute and then looked up at me in a businesslike fashion. "This won't be too hard,
mammal to mammal transitions are easy. It's more difficult when they pick something
really odd." She smiled at my reaction "Yes dear, this is in no way odd to us. For
example, I see you're standing on two legs in this picture, that means you won't have to
re-learn walking. I had a young man the other day who wanted to be an arachnid. He's
learning to move on eight legs, can you imagine that?" she asked incredulously and then
continued without waiting for a response, which was good as I couldn't have spoken if I
wanted to. I was still blown away by this whole experience. "Anyway," she went on,
"will you be going to our city?" I nodded "Good choice, most of your kind do and you'll
have an easier time adjusting among other furs. Oh yes, there are many others there.
Over a thousand in fact, they're some of our best customers." She grinned again at my
reaction. "You know, if your eyes get any wider they're going to pop clean out of your
skull dearie." I tried to relax, but it was hard. I was now grinning along with her. "You
must not be keeping up with the latest. Anyway, I'll set you up in the furry quarter. I
have just a few questions for you before you transition with Dr. Johnson. First, maybe it's
just the drawing, but you look like a child here?" she looked at me questioningly.
"Er...well...yeah? Is that okay?" I asked weakly. "Of course it is!" she exclaimed
pointing again at the sign. "There are a few younger furs running around already. In fact,
it solves the problem of where I'm going to put you." she said cryptically. I wanted to
ask her what that meant but she pushed right ahead before I could speak. "Female?" I
nodded "Do you lean more human or animal?" "I beg your pardon?!" I exclaimed. She
laughed uproariously. "Not like that sweetie!" she gasped "I mean do you want to be
biologically more like a mouse or a person? You know, in movement, body type,
senses..." "Oh." I said reddening "Animal I guess." "You sure? You don't seem
convinced." I thought a minute. Who wants to be human? "Yeah, I'm sure." I told her
with more confidence. She finished typing my information into the computer. "Follow
me." she got up and walked out the door.

I followed her down a hallway to a metal door bearing the words "Authorized
personal only." We continued through into a room with computers lining the wall and lab
equipment along one counter. A middle aged woman in a white coat looked up as we
came in. "Hi there! I'm doctor Elizabeth Johnson, are you nervous?" I shook her hand
and managed a week "yes" as she lead me to a table and told me to lay down. The next
few hours passed in a blur of questions. She had all the data I'd given to the councilor,
including my picture, but she still needed lots more to flesh out a three dimensional image
of my new body on her computers. When we finally got that settled she needed samples,
skin, blood, hair and others (I leave it to your imagination) to get my DNA for my new
body. She explained that she had to make sure I remained as genetically similar as
possible or my brain couldn't adjust properly. I asked what might happen but she seemed
evasive responding that everyone changed mentally a little bit, but hopefully not too
much. That gave me pause, but I felt totally committed at this point. I'd paid my money,
quit my job, and given up my apartment and possessions. What could I do? She told me
It would take a few days to grow the new body and directed me to the "guest
accommodations" that were part of the package. I went up to my room, exhausted, and
fell asleep.
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Poco

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PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:44 am

The next few days seemed to drag. My room was sparse, having only a TV, a bed and a
writing desk. It sort of reminded me of a college dorm. Even if I'd had more to entertain
me, though, I doubt I'd have been able to keep my mind off of waiting. After nearly five
years of saving and hoping, I couldn't believe it was almost time. Finally, toward the end
of the week, Dr. Johnson called me back in. "Here we go! Are you still nervous?" She
grinned at me. I tried to smile back and opened my mouth, but couldn't find my voice. "I
guess that's yes." She laughed "Don't worry, you won't even know what's happening."
With that she had me strip and climb up on an operating table. She placed a mask over
my face and told me to breathe and count backwards from a hundred. Then everything
went dark.

Some people say you have strange dreams while on anesthesia. I don't really
remember anything like that. I was vaguely aware of the passage of time, but it's so hard
to be sure. Really the next thought I had was something like: 'Jeez it's hot in here.' Not
terribly dramatic, I know, but you must realise that when I awoke I was back in my room
under two blankets and a comforter (it was January) and I was now covered in dense fur.
I lay there trying to shake off the residual fuzzy-headedness. 'What am I wearing?' I
thought, looking at my arms in front of me, covered in white fur. My head ached as I
pushed the blankets off of me and looked down. I nearly fainted. I looked at myself and
felt a surge of unreality wash over me. I was clearly not a human anymore. My body was
covered in a thick layer of white fur, completely concealing my skin. A row of small pink
nipples ran down either side of my chest. My...paws... were bare pink and so was
my...tail? I pulled out my tail from where I'd been sitting on it. It prickled slightly as the
blood returned to it. I'd been laying on it as I slept and now had that pins and needles
feeling. It was so odd. I was feeling an extremity I'd never had before. Looking at it I
realized it wasn't bare at all, but rather had a light coating of fur, far less then the rest of
my body. As the last of the anesthesia wore off my senses returned to me with a
vengeance. I could hear everything around me. The air coming through the furnace,
people moving and talking in adjoining rooms. I could smell the detergent they'd used to
wash the blankets, and, more faintly, the previous occupant of the room, the human me.

I tried to get up off the bed, to walk around the room. I quickly found that despite
what the councilor had said about not needing to re-learn walking I could barely stand.
My hind paws were much smaller than human feet and my center of gravity seemed a bit
different. I stood there, swaying slightly beside the bed. Finally, I thought to move my
tail out behind me and discovered it made an efficient balance. It still seemed strange to
be using it! I felt giddy as I moved slowly around the room toward the mirror. When I
had first arrived in the room it had seemed unusual to have a full-length mirror in such a
utilitarian setting, but now I understood. Standing before it I could see for the first time
my new form in it's entirety. I looked identical to the image in my imagination.

I stood in front of the mirror for a very long time, soaking in my new self. I
swiveled my ears, swayed my tail and ran my paws through my new fur. I walked around
the room a few more times, on both two legs and four. I found that although I preferred
two-legged walking, four seemed a bit easier once I got the hang of it. As I stood up
again a someone knocked at my door. "Come in!" I called and then jumped. I was
startled by the sound of new voice. It was high and breathy like a little girl's. The door
opened and in walked Dr. Johnson accompanied by a strange man. "Hello dear, how are
you feeling? Still dizzy at all?" "Not really," I replied slowly, still listening to my new
voice with wonder "My head still hurts a bit though." "Yes, the brain transplant takes a
few days to heal properly." Dr. Johnson said somewhat dismissively. "In the meantime,
how are you getting along with your new body? I see you can stand okay, have you tried
walking yet?" For the next few minutes we went through some basic motions and
activities, with Dr. Johnson helping me balance myself, which wasn't too hard now that I
was getting used to using my tail as a counterbalance. "Very good." said Dr. Johnson
after checking off the last item on her clipboard. "I'd like you to meet Matthew, our travel
coordinator. He'll be taking you to Lycaon, our city in Montana." The man, who had
been silent so far, stepped out of the corner and extended his hand. I stuck my paw out
uncertainly and he smiled and shook it gently. "Don't worry, we'll get you there in one
piece. And the only others on the plane will be newbies like you. New bodies, new lives.
Think of it as a support group if you want." He grinned at me. Dr. Johnson left us to
work out the travel plans. I had just enough money left for the ticket on the plane, which
wasn't included in the transition fee. As Matthew left the room I lay back on the bed,
hoping I wouldn't need any money in Lycaon City.

I spent most of the next morning going through the belongings I'd brought with
me to the center. My suitcase was mostly full of clothing, which I couldn't really use
anymore. I decided to ask about giving it to charity or something. In the end all I brought
with me was a necklace that had belonged to my mother, a blanket, and my stuffed
mouse, Edward. It really seemed like I was starting life over. We boarded the plane at
2:00 that afternoon. There were four of us, counting me. The woman sitting across from
me had light blue skin, white hair and shocking gold eyes. In the next seat over was a
man who looked like an elf. He had gold skin, silver hair and pointed ears. Sitting across
from him was what I can only describe as a gargoyle, complete with massive bat-like
wings. I was initially surprised that we were all so...inhuman I guess. But then it
occurred to me that the people getting human bodies didn't need to hide away like we did.
We talked for a while, sharing our experiences and wondering aloud what Lycaon City
would be like, but we soon lapsed into a nervous silence. I don't know about the others
but I had the worst case of butterflies I'd ever had. I didn't even know where I was going
when I got to the city. The councilor had said she'd place me somewhere, but where? In
my haste I'd forgotten to ask at the center. Hopefully someone would be able to tell me
where to go when we arrived.

After a few hours the plane began to descend over a medium-sized town that was
sitting in the middle of a vast forest. I stared at it out the window, somewhat
disappointed. I'd expected Lycaon City to be bigger, but upon reflection I guess 50,000
people or so was pretty large for a colony made up exclusively of our kind. There were
few large buildings and, as far as I could tell, there was only one road out of town. We
landed on a narrow runway next to a small building. The look of the airstrip gave the
place an even more remote feel. It was clear the little piper we'd taken was about all this
place could accommodate.

The four of us got off the plane and walked across the runway to the little building
that served as the terminal. The brutal wind reminded me that it was still the middle of
winter and I paused to wrap my blanket around my shoulders. I was enormously grateful
for my new fur. Inside the terminal the others said good-bye and wandered off towards a
desk on the far side of the room. They seemed to know what they were doing and I
wondered again why I hadn't been given any information. I looked around the room at
the other people milling about. There were all kinds of people, even a few other furs. I
noticed the furs seemed to be wearing clothing, and looked down self-consciously at my
nakedness, being clad only in a necklace and a blanket. No one said anything about it
though. In fact, hardly anyone looked at me at all. I'd just made up my mind to go to the
desk the others had walked off to and ask for help when I heard a voice from behind me.
"There you are!!!" Turning around I saw a young female bear with golden brown fur
hurrying towards me. "I heard your plane had already arrived!" she panted breathlessly
"I'm so sorry I'm late I got held up by the director and by the way how was the trip?" she
stammered out so rapidly I could hardly follow her speech. "Um...okay I guess. I'm
sorry, I don't really know who you are? No one told me anything." She smiled down at
me sympathetically. "I'm sorry baby. My name's Melanie and I'm the surrogate mother
assigned to you by the orphanage." she knelt down and embraced me. (I should mention
here that EVERYONE was bigger than me. I'd assumed it was because I was a mouse,
but now I realized I also had child proportions, which of course I'd wanted). When she let
me go Melanie looked at me appraisingly. "I must admit I know nothing about you
either, honey. I was just told there'd be a little mouse girl on the next plane. What's your
name?" I had to pause before answering this simple question. What was my name,
anyway? It seemed inconceivable that I hadn't even thought about it. The staff at the
center hadn't brought it up. We hadn't exchanged names of the plane either. In hindsight,
it was almost as if we were avoiding the subject. I guess I could just use my old name.
But a new one seemed warranted for my new life. "Haven't really thought about it, have
you?" Melanie asked me with an amused look on her face. "Well..." I stammered,
blushing a bit. This lady made me feel like a nervous child! "You'd be surprised how
few of us give the subject any thought before we arrive here. Most people don't ever
choose their own name. It's a hard thing to do." I nodded, agreeing that I'd never thought
about renaming myself. But I guess I'd have to. Melanie watched me for a few minutes
and then smiled. "I could name you, if you want me to. After all, I'm going to be your
mommy." I gazed at her, startled by the whole statement. She had mentioned that she
was my mother before, but I hadn't really processed it completely. "You're my mother?"
I asked incredulously. "Yes dear, the orphanage assigned you to me." "Orphanage?" I
was definately missing something here. "That's where we're heading now. All the little
furs go there first. I don't really like the name 'orphanage' though. It sounds dreary" she
wrinkled her nose cutely. "Lets get going. You can think on the way." She took my paw
and led me out a door on the terminal's other side. I wrapped my blanket more tightly
around myself when we stepped outside. It seemed like it had gotten even colder in the
half hour or so I'd spent in there. It had also begun snowing.

Melanie led me to a dark-colored sedan that was waiting with the engine running.
We both got into the back seat. Puzzled, I looked in front and saw a male wolf behind the
wheel. He grinned and winked at me but said nothing. In a few moments we were
driving slowly along the snow-covered road into town.

I looked out the window at Lycaon City as we passed through it. The place had a
kind of helter-skelter feel to it, with the buildings as diverse as the people who made
them. Here was a gothic-style mansion, here was a glass-and-steel dome, and here was a
Romanesque temple. The only rule seemed to be that the structures couldn't be ordinary.
I stared for about fifteen minutes before Melanie broke the silence. "Penny for your
thoughts, mousey?" I looked back her direction. "Oh, just looking." I looked away
again, suddenly feeling very self conscious and shy. "What's your friend's name?" she
asked. I looked over at her, confused as to what she meant. She was pointing at my
stuffed mouse that I had forgotten I was holding. "Oh, this is Edward." I replied, holding
him up for her to see. "Hello Edward. It's so nice to meet you." Melanie said solemnly,
taking one of his paws and shaking it. I couldn't help giggling. She smiled at me and
stroked my ears for a few seconds. I snuggled closer to her. "So, have you decided on a
name yet?" she asked me after a few more minutes of silence. I yawned. "I thought you
were going to name me?" I looked up at her face and saw her smile widen. "Really?
You want me to?" "Sure, I guess so." She pondered a minute more. "I think I know."
she finally said "Did you ever see the movie The Secret of NIMH?" I nodded. It was one
of my favorites, in fact. "You look just like Cynthia! Mrs. Brisby's little daughter? Well,
you have the same color fur anyway. And you're both adorable." She tickled my tummy
a little making me grin. "So I'm Cynthia?" I asked her. "If you want to be." I thought for
only a second. "Sure, okay." She smiled down at me and began stroking my head again.
I had nearly nodded off laying against her side when the car came to a halt. "We're here."
the wolf said, getting out and opening our door for us. "Come on sweetie, lets get you
inside." Melanie said, helping me out of the car. I got out and walked up the steps to my
new home.
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Poco

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Number of posts : 856
Localisation : High in the Rocky Mountains
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PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:47 am

The front hall was exactly what you'd expect from a building like this. The floors were
polished hardwood. The door to the left was open to reveal a living room strewn with
toys and featuring a large TV which was turned off at the moment. The door to the right
was closed. In front of us was a staircase with an ornately carved banister, which I
assumed led to the bedrooms upstairs. From the back of the house I could hear giggling
and talking in childish voices. I perked up my ears to listen, but Melanie smoothed them
back, smiling down at me. "You'll meet them later, Cynthia." she said, seeming to
interpret my thoughts. "Right now I think we should get you dressed." I nodded,
yawning. She picked me up without warning and wrapped me in my blanket.
"Someone's a tired little mouse." she said through an indulgent smile as she carried me
up the stairs. I lay my head on her shoulder and closed my eyes while she rubbed my
back. Incredibly, I almost nodded off in the short trip up the stairs and down the hall to
my room.

I came back to attention when Melanie set me on the dresser. Sitting up I rubbed
my eyes and looked around the room. I was sitting on a large dresser. Across the room
was a crib. There were a few other pieces of furniture in the room including a rocking
chair and what looked like a toy chest. I frowned slightly. Was I going to be sleeping in
a crib? I looked over at Melanie who was happily pulling some lavender one-piece
pajamas out of the dresser below me.

Melanie stood up with some clothing under her arm. "Okay baby, lay down!" she
ordered cheerfully. Lay down? Surely she couldn't put the pajamas on me if I was laying
down, could she? Then I noticed she was holding a disposable diaper in one hand.
"Um..." I began, eyeing the diaper warily. "What's wrong sweetie?" Melanie asked,
looking concerned. "Am I supposed to wear that?" I asked. She looked at the diaper and
then back at me with an amused smile. "Well, it's not for me silly!" she replied. "And
am I supposed to...use it?" I asked again in a small voice. "Well, you ARE my little
mouse baby aren't you?" Melanie asked, looking at me with a sulky frown. For the
second time that night I found myself astounded by my lack of forethought. I'd been so
focused on getting this new body that I'd hardly even considered what came next. I'd
assumed that once I got to Lycaon City all my problems would be solved, but here I was,
again being forced to make an extremely odd decision. How old was I? Was I in
diapers?

"I...don't know." I said uncertainly. She looked at me for a long moment. "Well,
I won't make you." she said finally, in an unhappy voice. "But I think you'd look
adorable in them. And, " she said smiling slightly "I wouldn't mind changing you, if that's
what you're worried about. I've been wanting a little girl since I got here." I looked at the
floor, feeling guilty. Melanie seemed so nice. Plus, she was the only friend I had here.
But, I had to admit the loss of control scared me. Did I want to be totally dependent on
her? Really, I hardly even knew who she was. "What if I wore them, " I asked "but didn't
USE them? Then I'd, you know, look cute for you, but..." I trailed off, blushing, not sure
how to finish. She smiled. "Sure, whatever you want, honey." I lay back and let her
diaper me. Then, I stood as she dressed me in the lavender pajamas, threaded my long
tail through a hole in the bottom and zipped me up the back. I felt warm and cozy
dressed like this. She picked me up again and began carrying me down the hall to the
stairs. "Let's get you dinner. You must be starving, it's almost eight o'clock!" I realized I
was hungry. I hadn't eaten since breakfast nearly twelve hours ago!

On the staircase we passed a leopardess leading a little husky puppy by the paw.
His face and shirt were covered with food. "Alright Samuel, it's time for bath and bed."
Samuel pouted, then saw me and Melanie. He waved excitedly. I smiled back and
Melanie said "Hi Katie, hello Samuel." "Oh, Melanie! This must be your new daughter!"
Katie cooed. "Isn't she sweet!" I smiled shyly, and buried my face into Melanie's
shoulder. Like Melanie, Katie seemed to have a talent for making me feel like a shy child.
I wondered briefly if that was a prerequisite for working here.

When the adults were done talking, Katie and Samuel went upstairs and Melanie
and I went back down. We passed through the cluttered and messy living room into a
kitchen near the back of the house. Melanie sat me in a high chair and busied herself
making some soup and toast. She fed me herself, and I didn't protest because I still felt
sort of bad for disappointing her with the diapers. She spooned the soup into my mouth,
blowing on each spoonful to cool it. Then she tore my toast into little pieces and fed that
to me. Finally she gave me a bottle of apple juice to drink while she ate her dinner. I
finished the bottle and then lay my head down on my tray and fell asleep. I was
exhausted from my long day.

I awoke in the middle of the night needing to pee very badly. Looking around I
saw I had somehow made my way up to my room. I was alone, although Melanie had
thoughtfully put Edward in my crib with me and turned on a nightlight in the corner. My
need to use the bathroom was overpowering. I quickly climbed out of my crib, which
was easy with my new mouse body and scurried to the door. Outside in the hallway I
paused. I had no idea where the bathroom was. I crept quietly down the hall, not wanting
to disturb any sleeping children. I stopped outside each doorway, listening and smelling.
Each room seemed to have a sleeping occupant. Finally, at the very end of the hallway,
near the stairs I found a bathroom. I hurried inside, shutting the door before turning on
the light. I now needed to go very badly. I looked down a my PJ's for several seconds
before remembering that they zipped up the back. Reaching around behind me I found I
could barely grasp the top of the zipper. I pulled several times at an awkward angle
before realizing I had managed to catch it on a piece of fabric and snag the zipper shut. I
struggled futiley for a few seconds more, my need now desperate, before trying to pull the
pajamas down from the neck. I had managed to unzip them a little, but not enough to
pass over my shoulders. I whimpered softly as I felt myself wetting my diaper
unwillingly. It swelled warmly against me, and even leaked a little. Losing control of my
emotions, I sat down on the bathroom floor and cried for several minutes in frustration.
Finally I got up and went back out into the hall. I wanted to find Melanie, to ask her for
help, but I didn't have any idea where to look for her. I was getting very sleepy again, and
was a little spooked to be wandering around this unfamiliar house so late at night. I
decided to return to my room until morning. Climbing back into my crib, I snuggled up
with Edward and, whimpering a little again at the wetness of my diaper, fell back asleep.

I awoke early the next morning to the discomfort of my soggy diaper. Climbing
again from my crib I looked around the room to see if there was a clock to tell me if it
was late enough to search again for Melanie, who was still AWOL. All I found was a
curtained window and, looking outside, I saw the sun was just rising. Despite my
discomfort I was captivated by the sight of the snow covered city below. It seemed the
orphanage was built on a hill above Lycaon City, which had easily the most unique
skyline I'd ever seen. I stared for several minutes before the door behind me opened.

"There you are!" I said grumpily, turning to see Melanie entering the room.
"What's wrong honey?" She asked, taken aback by my greeting (or lack of one). "I need
you to change me." I said, feeling the blood rush to my face. "What?" "I'M WET!" I
practically shouted in frustration, blushing even harder and nearing tears again. Melanie
picked me up and, shushing me softly, sat me down on the dresser again. As she
struggled with the stuck zipper on my pajamas I told her the story of the night before.
She was silent for a moment when I'd finished and then said: "You know, I realize you're
upset, but I'm kind of glad this happened." "I know, " I said more icily than I intended (I
was embarrassed, plus I'm really not a morning person) "you want me to be your little
baby." "Yes." Melanie replied evenly "But I also want you to succeed here so we can
leave." I was confused again, and more then a little tired of feeling that way. "What are
you talking about?" I asked as she lay me down to remove my sopping diaper. "Come
on, I'll explain while you have your bath."

Melanie carried me down the hall in silence and we entered the bathroom by the
stairs I'd discovered the night before. As Melanie drew me some bath water she began
speaking again. "You see, Cynthia, everyone in Lycaon has some adjusting to do.
Shortly after the city was founded the more experienced residents began setting up
organizations to aid the newer ones, and help them transition. Over time, the
organizations become specialized, with similar types of citizens helping the newcomers
most like themselves. As one of the largest groups here, we furs created our own group
to help newcomers." None of this surprised me much. In fact, it made perfect sense, and
I'd been hoping to come across such a group upon arriving. "So, " I asked "what's that
got to do with what happened...you know...last night?" She smiled "Well, that's what I'm
getting to. You see, there really are all kinds here, and it wasn't too long before the first
adult babies arrived, only they were real babies now." I nodded, seeing where this was
going. "At first we just found willing parents to take them in, and with some that worked
out great. But, as you're discovering now, it wasn't that easy for all of them." "What
happened?" I asked, hardly noticing as she rubbed scented baby shampoo through my fur.
"I'd have thought you'd figured that much out by now. They had troubles. There's a LOT
of trust involved in become a child again, and in accepting a new caretaker as a mommy
or daddy. Also, some discovered they didn't want to always be a child. They started
regressing back to their old, adult, personalities, like you did this morning." I didn't
notice her frowning at me because I was trying to wrap my mind around the concept of
regressing away from regression. "Well, what's wrong with that?" I asked a little
defensively. "If someone needs to take a break, why not just let them?" "Because it isn't
only about you!" Melanie snapped, stopping bathing me for a moment. "Your caretaker
is providing everything you need, and she expects you to be her child in return, not just at
your convenience, but always!" I was stunned, and felt my eyes tearing at Melanie's
angry tone. I struggled to control myself and nodded. "I'm sorry, Melanie." I said quietly,
with only a slight quaver in my voice "I should have thought of your feelings before I
snapped at you this morning." "It's okay, Cynthia. I shouldn't have gotten mad just then
either. I remember how confusing everything is the first few days." She hugged me and
then resumed her story.

"So anyway, the new children were having more trouble adjusting then even the
other townspeople, because they had new personalities as well as new bodies to adapt to.
So we designed special orientation centers for them, called orphanages. Here you're
going to learn to behave as a child does while bonding with your new caretaker, that's
me." She smiled down at me. "And so, the reason I'm kind of glad that happened last
night is I can't take you home until you learn to accept your new role in life, positives and
negatives both." I pondered her words as she pulled me from the tub and began to dry me
off. So I was in a kind of school to learn to be a toddler? And I'd stay here until I
passed? Then what? I guess I go home with Melanie. Hmmm...
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PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:47 am

Melanie led me down the hall to my room and sat me back on the dresser. She rediapered
me. I didn't protest at all, her rebuke was still fresh in my mind! Then she put me in a
new set of pajamas, explaining that it was too cold to go outside anyway. These new
pajamas where one- piece like the lavender ones, only these were powder blue and had
feet on them. Also, I noticed, these snapped up the front instead of zipping up the back.
I'd be able to remove them easily if I wanted to. I wasn't really sure how I felt though. I
now knew I couldn't leave until I got used to using the diaper. Melanie said nothing
about our conversation and also didn't lay out any expectations for me. I guessed it was
my decision to make.

We went downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast. This time there were other furs
there with us. I recognized Samuel and Katie from last night and there was also a little
bunny girl. She was being fed by a beautiful lady fox. Melanie put me into a high chair
and then busied herself making our breakfast. I looked around at the other two for some
sign that they, like me, were at all uncomfortable with this. Samuel was fussing and
moving his head, causing his breakfast to get all over his face and shirt, just like when I
saw him last night. He seemed convincingly enough like a baby! The bunny girl was
much less squrimy. She sat calmly accepting each bite of food, and smiled lovingly up at
her "mommy."

Melanie came back with some oatmeal and began feeding me. I ate in silence,
pondering my new life. Now that the initial confusion was over I could think more
clearly about all that had been happening to me the past couple of days. I had been
resisting out of fear, but obviously I wanted this to some degree or I wouldn't have chosen
as I did. I wished there was someone I could talk to who would understand the position I
was in! Looking over at Samuel and the bunny I nearly smacked my forehead in
frustration at my own stupidity. Of course there was someone! I resolved to talk to them
as soon as possible.

Melanie finished up feeding me the oatmeal. She did a few "airplanes" with the
spoon in an attempt to get me out of my funk. I smiled at her, but didn't feel much like
playing so she gave me a bottle of chocolate milk and sat down with the fox to eat her
breakfast. Samuel was getting cleaned up and the bunny girl, like me, was sitting in a
high chair waiting for her mommy. I smiled and waved at her and she smiled back and
wiggled her ears. She was dressed in pink pajamas and had little bows around the ends of
her ears, which I thought looked kind of silly. She seemed nice enough though. Looking
over at Melanie I saw that she and the fox were looking at us with maternal smiles on
their faces. "Come on, Stephanie, let's let these two out to play." Melanie said to the fox
with a grin. Stephanie went over to the bunny, who was clapping gleefully, and carried
her into the next room, where Samuel and Katie had already gone. Melanie picked me up
and followed.

I recognized the toy-strewn living room as the one to the left of the front hall
when I'd first come into the house. Melanie set me down with Samuel and the bunny,
who I overheard being called "Dana" by Stephanie. Samuel ran over and wrapped Dana
in a bearhug, his tail wagging fiercely. I giggled, he was so puppyish! Dana grinned,
patting his head and said "Hi Sammy!" "Hi Dana!" he turned to me and the next thing I
knew I was enveloped in a similar hug. "Hi Cynthia! Wanna play?" My expression must
have been amusing because the mothers and Dana all started laughing. Katie came over
and gently pried Samuel off of me. He scurried over to some toy cars and began rolling
them around a little plastic gas station going "vroom vroom." I giggled again and turned
to Dana, who was playing with some blocks. "So, what do you think of all this?" I
asked, once our mommies were absorbed in conversation. "All what?" she asked,
wrinkling her nose at me. "You know, being a kid again. Being taken care of...wearing
diapers..." I trailed off. "Oh! It's fun isn't it?" She smiled at me and then returned to her
tower. "You don't feel weird about it?" I pressed, wanting to talk some more. "Nope."
she replied, not even looking up. "Not even at first?" Dana looked over at me a little
frustrated. "Look," she said in a more adult tone "you need to relax a little and just go
with it. You'll never get to go home with Melanie if you keep talking that way. Also, you
might hurt my chances here too." she softened a bit "I know what you're going through,
and yes, I went through it too. Sammy might not have." she gestured over to where the
little puppy was still playing, oblivious. "Some people are just made that way. Just
loosen up and enjoy it. I mean, you did sign on for all this, didn't you?" I nodded. She
was right. As soon as our conversation ended, Dana's expression went from adult to
childlike instantly. It was as if we'd never spoken. I marveled at that for a moment and
then picked Edward off the ground and walked over to Samuel. "Hi Sammy!" He
grinned up at me. "Wanna play?" he yipped. "Sure." I immediately gave up on trying to
talk to Samuel. He seemed completely innocent and I could scarcely believe he'd ever
been an adult. After a few minutes Dana got involved in our game and we drove the cars
around her block city for the next hour or so.

Finally, around midmorning, Katie came over to change Samuel's diaper. Melanie
took advantage of the pause in activity to tell me we needed to meet the director of the
orphanage. She carried me through the entrance hall to the closed door on the right and
knocked. "Enter" came a male voice with a trace of a British accent. We entered and I
found myself in a small office done in dark wood. Across the desk sat a handsome lynx
with silver and white fur. I wondered if his coat would darken in the summer, like a real
animal's or would it stay the same color all the time? I almost asked Melanie, but then
caught myself, thinking it might be rude. We sat down in a chair across from him. "This
is Cynthia, Winston." Melanie said, sitting me on her lap. "Hello, Cynthia. How are you
getting on here?" He smiled warmly at me. "Fine." I whispered shyly. He smiled again
and then directed his attention to Melanie.

The two of them talked about me for awhile. I tried to pay attention, but found
my mind wandering. What was wrong with me? Why couldn't I concentrate? My short
attention span coupled with my near continual confusion worried me. I remembered
suddenly the doctor at the center. She'd said everyone changes a little, mentally. Was
this state of mind just my brain synching up to my child's body? Was that why Samuel
and Dana acted so childlike?

I suddenly realized I had to go pee again. I didn't want to bother Melanie and the
director, and the need wasn't too bad so I stayed quiet. They kept on talking for a few
minutes, going on about action plans and so forth. I deduced that Melanie had told him
about last night because he was "quite concerned" by my "adultlike outburst and
reticence." The need to go was getting worse more quickly then I'd anticipated. I
squirmed a bit and Melanie began shushing me and rubbing my back. Misinterpreting my
fidgeting for boredom the director gave me a lollipop to quiet me down, assuring me
they'd be done in a few minutes. I stared at the candy, absorbed by the childish
connotation. I thought about Samuel, and how happy he seemed. I thought about Dana,
and how she'd correctly pointed out that we'd all signed on for this. I thought about
Melanie and how right she was. She did deserve a child in all aspects, not just those that
suited me. 'What the hell' I thought. I began to go in my diaper. It was harder then I'd
thought it would be. When I finally started to wet, Melanie's paw stopped rubbing my
back. I looked up at her, and saw she was smiling down at me. I looked away quickly,
realizing she could feel what was happening. I felt myself flushing. I'd peed on her leg!
Of course, the diaper kept her dry, but she'd felt it! She began rubbing my back again and
when I looked up she was staring at the director, apparently understanding my
embarrassment.

True to his word, the director showed us out a few minutes later, patting my head
paternally as we left. He didn't know what had happened, and probably wouldn't have
cared, I realized. Melanie took me over to the changing table in the living room and got
me a fresh diaper. I was a little embarrassed, but no one, mommies or children, even
noticed. Melanie gave me a big hug when she was done. "Thank you." She murmured
before setting me down in front of the TV with Samuel and Dana. I felt strangely proud.

The rest of the morning passed quickly. We watched cartoons until lunch time.
After lunch (which was tomato soup and PB&J sandwiches) it was time for a nap.
Melanie led me upstairs to my room for a story before naptime. We curled up in the
rocking chair together and she began to read from a book called "Animal Tails". We
were getting to the part where the otter was convincing his landlubber friends to sail with
him down the river when I realized I had to poop. Upon reflection, I was surprised this
hadn't come up sooner. After all, it had been three days since I had transitioned to this
body. I fidgeted a bit and then looked up at Melanie. "What's wrong, pumpkin?" she
asked sweetly. "Um...well. I kinda hafta go to the potty." I stammered. Potty? There it
was again. The subtle mental shift. "Well, you didn't have a problem earlier. Are you
saying you want to go back now?" She looked at me severely. "Well, it's different..." I
started and then looked away, blushing. "Oh. I see." she said giving me an amused look.
"Well, you go ahead. I don't mind, I promise." She wrapped one arm around me and
looked down expectantly. She couldn't be serious? She expected me to go here? In her
lap? With her watching?

I stared back at her, unsure how to handle this. "Well, hurry up." she finally
encouraged. "If you wait, we won't be able to finish the story before naptime. If you
really wait, you'll be napping in a dirty diaper, because I'm putting you down regardless in
about fifteen minutes." That got me going, because there was no way I was laying in my
crib for an hour in a dirty diaper. I felt myself blushing furiously as I tried to let go.
"Could you at least look away?" I snapped, "regressing" again like I had this morning.
She grinned again and began reading from the book aloud once more. "The otter had no
trouble getting the frog to join him on the river..." I strained a bit and felt the warm mess
spread uncomfortably. "...but the mole didn't want to leave dry land..." she continued,
pretending not to notice. After a few seconds I murmured "I'm done." softly, still looking
away from her face. She picked me up gently and carried me over to the dresser for a
change. She stripped, wiped and powdered me quickly and quietly, in deference to my
embarrassment. As she taped up a fresh diaper she spoke softly: "There now, that wasn't
TOO bad, was it? You're all clean again." I looked up at her. She smiled gently and,
without waiting for a reply, carried me back to the chair where we finished the chapter
before I was laid down for my nap.

As I lay in my crib waiting for sleep to come, I thought about Melanie. She
seemed to be such a contradiction, both loving and harsh at times. Would she have really
made me lay there in a dirty diaper if I had not performed for her? Or was that just a
threat to get me to accept my new position? I hadn't decided yet how I felt about her
when sleep overtook me.
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PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:49 am

I was walking down the hallway of my old home. Before me lay everything I'd left
behind. I hurried toward it, but each step I took I grew smaller and smaller. As I
approached my old life my possessions seemed to tower over my diminished form. I tried
to grab them, but they floated up into the air. I leapt for them only to find that a cage was
springing out of the ground around me. I watched helplessly through the cage bars as my
old life floated away from me. Finally, I sat down and wept...

...I awoke to find myself staring through bars at an enormous room. I sat bolt
upright in shock before realizing that the bars were the sides of my crib, and the room was
regular size, I was just in my new, toddler sized body. I lay there and sighed. I wasn't
really sure how I felt anymore, except the loss of control over my life was scaring me to
death. I stood in my crib and looked out the window at the town below me. I had hoped
to explore Lycaon City, to meet its inhabitants. Now it seemed that I wouldn't get to see
it until I was regressed. I wouldn't really be able to understand it then. I'd be like Samuel.
What was he still doing here? He clearly was ready to move on. I leaned against the bars
of my crib and buried my head in my paws. I briefly considered climbing out, but where
would I go? Even if I got out of there, I had nothing. Well, almost nothing, I thought,
looking into the corner of my crib where Edward sat tangled up in my blanket. I chuckled
inwardly. The sum total of my life: a doll and a blankie. I guess I'd have to trust
Melanie. After all, I reminded myself for the hundredth time, I'd volunteered for this,
hadn't I?

Eventually Melanie came into the room. She seemed taken aback to see me
standing in my crib, looking worriedly out the window. "Is everything all right?" She
asked. "Yeah, I just wasn't tired." I lied. "Well, let's check your diaper and then you can
play some more. She checked me, and I was fine. I was a little resentful, since she
could've just asked me if I needed a change. Of course, you don't ask a real toddler, so she
wouldn't ask me either. Again I reminded myself that this was how it would be from now
on.

As we went downstairs (she let me walk this time, instead of carrying me,
although she held my paw on the staircase.) I voiced something that had been bothering
me all day: "Melanie? Why is Sammy, er...Samuel still here? He seems like he should
be okay to leave, doesn't he?" "You know Cynthia, you should really be calling me
'mommy', not Melanie." she replied, and then said no more. I waited a few seconds.
"Okay, mommy then. So what's up with Sammy?" She scooted me into the playroom
and toward the others. "Go play." she said and hurried over to the couch where the other
mommies all sat. I glared at her resentfully for a moment before turning toward the other
kids.

My momentary distraction cost me, however, because I was quickly knocked to
the ground and enveloped in a monstrous hug by none other then Samuel himself. "Hi
Cynthia! Did you have a good nap? Wanna play some more?" He shouted into my
sensitive ears. "Er..., yeah, okay Sammy." I said, gently pushing him off of me and
petting his ears in a feeble attempt to calm him down. "Neat! What do you wanna do?"
He asked me. "Actually, Sammy, I was wondering if I could ask you something?"
"Okay" he said looking confused already. "How long have you been here?" Dana
looked up at me, but Sammy just grinned. "That's easy! I just came down after my nap!
Well, not right after. First mommy changed me and then..." "Um...no Sammy, that's not
what I meant. " I said, cutting him off, "I mean how long have you lived here? At the
orphanage?" Sammy thought about this a minute. Dana kept her eyes on me and I
looked over at our mommies for any sign they were listening to us. They seemed
absorbed in conversation. Katie saw me watching and waved at me, I smiled back and
looked away quickly, pretending to be building a block house. Dana squinted at me but
kept silent. Finally, Sammy answered. "I don't know," he said, "I guess forever." "That
can't be right Sammy." I replied, trying to conceal my exasperation. "Think really hard.
Isn't there anything before you got here? Another life maybe?" He furrowed his brow,
thinking as hard as he could. Oddly, the thoughtful pose only made him look more
juvenile, like a child mimicking an adult. "Nope." he said finally. "Are you sure?
There's nothing?" "Uh-uh." he said "I've always lived here." I felt chilled to the bone. I
looked at Dana and saw that she seemed alarmed as well. Could he be serious? He'd
really forgotten his entire life before Lycaon?

I sat there mechanically building block houses as I thought this over. What had
happened to him? Was he just pretending? If he wasn't, what had they done to create so
perfect a mental transformation? I cursed myself for my inattentiveness in the director's
office. Why hadn't I been able to concentrate? I wish I hadn't been so easily distracted...

Speaking of distraction, I was suddenly pulled out of my thoughts by the sight of a
red rubber ball rolling past me. Dana and Samuel were rolling the ball back and forth to
each other. If Dana was still worried about what we'd just heard, she was hiding it well.
About every third roll, they'd miss each other and one of them would chase after the ball,
laughing. I was transfixed by their playing, and even laid down to better watch the
movement of the ball. I pillowed Edward under my head and stared raptly.

"Not sleepy, eh?" I was in Melanie's arms. How had I gotten there? Looking
down I saw Dana and Sammy had stopped rolling the ball and moved on to a doll house.
"See what happens when you skip your nap?" Melanie chided gently. "C'mon, we'd
better change you before you get a rash." I was wet? When did that happen? She took
me over to the changing table and sure enough, I was wet. I struggled to regain my
thoughts. Something important flitted around the edge of my mind. I had been worried...

Melanie finished up and carried me over to the couch, sitting me on her lap. "Are
you okay, or do you want to sleep some more?" I was sort of tired. I thought for a
moment, and Melanie popped a bottle of apple juice into my mouth. I lay against her
shoulder as she held the bottle for me. Drifting off to sleep I missed the triumphant
expression on her face.
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PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:49 am

The rest of the day passed pretty uneventfully. I woke up a little while later and played a
bit before dinner. Then it was bath time, followed by some quiet one-on-one time with
Melanie before bed.

As I lay in my crib I again found my mind racing with thoughts. It seemed so
frustrating, I was so easily distracted that the only time I could organize myself was when
I was alone here in the dark. After the past couple of days I could no longer believe
Melanie was a bad person. She had shown me every kindness, but was very determined
to regress me as quickly as possible. The only really annoying thing she kept doing was
dodging my questions. Every time I confronted her about one of my fears she distracted
me, or simply acted as if I hadn't spoken.

I scowled as I thought this out. I was perfectly willing to play along and become
Melanie's daughter, but I couldn't really let this go. I wanted my answers before I dove
right in. Why was I having these mental difficulties? Why was Sammy still here when it
was clear he was done being regressed? For that matter, why couldn't Sammy even
remember he'd ever been anything but what he was now? Was that going to happen to
me and Dana?

I got up and began climbing out of my crib. I wanted answers and I had a pretty
good idea where I'd find them. I paused at my bedroom door, listening. The house was
silent. I had no idea what time it was, but it seemed everyone was asleep. I tiptoed into
the dark hallway and moved toward the stairs.

I climbed down the stairs as quietly as, well...a mouse. Turning toward the
director's office I was surprised to see a light on inside. I'd planned on looking around the
place while he was away, but a quick listen at the door revealed someone was typing
away in there. I debated going back upstairs, but a recklessness seized me and I knocked
loudly before I could stop myself.

I'd half expected to hear him call out "enter" as he had before. Instead, I heard
footsteps heading toward the door. It opened slightly, revealing the lynx director looking
slightly more disheveled then when I'd last seen him. His jacket and tie were gone and he
was clearly very tired. He looked surprised to see me for a moment, but he quickly
slipped his paternal smile back on.

"Little Cynthia! And what would you be doing out of bed so late?" "Well, I
couldn't sleep. I had some questions I wanted to ask you." I replied. "Come now, I'm
sure your mommy will be happy to answer any questions you have in the morning. Now
off to bed with you." He made a shooing gesture with both paws and began to walk
toward the stairs, clearly expecting me to follow.

"She won't, though." I responded firmly, standing in the doorway of his office "In
fact, I get the distinct impression she isn't allowed to answer these particular questions." I
gave him a knowing look. "Really?" he responded slowly, his smile faltering slightly
and becoming more like a grimace. "In that case, I get the distinct impression you're
asking questions you're better off leaving be." He continued staring down at me, letting
the silence spiral on uncomfortably. I refused to look away, not wanting him to have his
way. Finally, my willpower fading, I broke the silence. "Well, it's just..." I began,
putting on my best babyish expression in hopes of getting him to drop his guard "...it's
just that I get sorta scared. And...I was hoping you'd talk to me a bit, just for a few
minutes. I promise to go right back to bed after, okay?" I looked up at his face again
with wide, innocent eyes. My expression immediately fell. The director was grinning
down at me with a predatory look on his face. He clearly wasn't buying my act at all.

"Why of course, darling. Why didn't you just say so? Come in, come in." He
opened the office door wide and bowed slightly, gesturing with one paw. I stood there,
rooted to the spot with fear. The toothy grin hadn't left his face. He clearly knew what I
was up to, but was inviting me into his office anyway. Suddenly hurrying upstairs to my
crib and taking another crack at Melanie in the morning seemed like a great idea.

As though reading my mind, the director's paw clamped over my wrist. Looking
up I saw his grin had widened, revealing sharp, dangerous canines. "Come now, Cynthia.
You came here seeking answers, and answers you shall have." He pulled me into his
office and shut the door behind us.

The director sat me down in the same chair I'd been in earlier and walked around
his desk, taking his time settling in. Finally, he looked across the desk at me. His
piercing stare unsettled me. It seemed as though my head were transparent, and he could
read my thoughts. Looking into his eyes I saw resentment and a bit of amusement. He
seemed to be saying 'Stupid little girl, you not only challenge me, you do it alone in the
middle of the night. What were you thinking?' It didn't help that I was asking myself the
same question.

Uncomfortable with his stare, I dropped my gaze to his desk, which was littered
with papers. I noticed several of them bore the letterhead of The New Reality Project.
What was that about? I started to lean in for a closer look, but then quickly caught
myself. For a split second my curiosity had almost caused me to forget the situation I was
in! The stress of this encounter was bringing back my mysterious distractibility.

I looked up at the director again and saw his expression had changed to one of
amusement. I was reminded of my friend's cat when he was playing with a particularly
entertaining toy. It was not a comforting thought. "Well now, Cynthia." he said, clearing
the papers off his desk and sticking them into a drawer. "Why so quiet? I thought you
had important questions to ask me? The kind that keep young minds awake at night?"
He leaned back in his chair and fixed me again with that amused smirk. I wasn't sure
what to say. I was quite uncomfortable, and suddenly aware that I had wet recently, and
unknowingly. "Um..." I said looking away. I couldn't seem to remember just what it
was I'd come down here for.

"Is it young Samuel? Melanie said something..." He prompted. "Come on now,
hurry up and ask so we can both get back to bed." I looked up startled. His voice had
resumed that paternal quality, but his expression belied his tone. I got the impression he
didn't really care how long this took.

"Oh, right. Yes. Sammy...er, Samuel." I stammered. "Yes, your little friend.
Sammy if you prefer. Melanie mentioned you were interested in his background." "Well,
he doesn't know when he got here." I began, and then it came pouring out. "He doesn't
seem to remember anything. He has no memory of being a human, or an adult. He says
he's always lived here. And I don't know why he's still here at all. He's obviously ready
to leave and be Katie's son." I stopped myself. For some reason I felt like crying.

"He's ready to leave?" the director asked quietly "You pronounce this on what
authority?" I stared hard at the floor. "Well, he's a perfect little kid." I said lamely.
"Your confidence in your friend is admirable, Cynthia. But I regret to say you don't know
what you are talking about. In fact, you remind me quite a bit of little Samuel when he
first arrived." I looked up startled. Sammy had been like me? What did that mean? "Oh
yes, " he continued, seeing my expression, "Sammy also had some troubles his first few
weeks. We were able to work through them though. Perhaps the knowledge we gained
will benefit you as well." His smirk came back. "Yes, the more I think about it the more
you remind me of our little puppy friend."

I sat in stunned silence for a moment. I felt worse then ever. Good God, was I
really going to end up like Sammy? Unable to even remember my old life, or humanity
in general? I opened my mouth to ask the director what he'd done to wipe Sammy's
memory clean that way but stopped myself. I was suddenly afraid to hear the answer.

"Yes?" The director asked. He'd seen me start to say something. I looked at him
mutely for a few moments. "I've been having a problem." I began finally. "What kind of
problem? I'll help you, of course, if I can." 'I bet you will.' I thought, but continued
anyway, not really having a choice. "Well, I've been having trouble concentrating, and
with my memory. It seems that the littlest things distract me." "Cynthia, dear." He said
soothingly, in that fatherly voice of his, "Cynthia, that's normal at your age. You must
expect that. Now, listen. I know your'e having trouble adjusting, but you simply must
trust us. We'll help you along your journey if you'll only let us do so. Come along now,
you need to return to bed." With that he came back around the desk and picked me up. I
didn't bother to struggle. I now feared this man more than anything. The creature who'd
once seemed like a handsome silver-furred lynx with a charming accent was now a
vicious predator in my mind. As he carried me back upstairs he commented, patting my
bum, "It seems you've wet." 'Oh God, ' I thought, 'please don't let him change me.' I
didn't have to worry, though, he simply laid me in my crib, and tucked me in. "Go to
sleep now, little one." he ordered, walking out and closing the door behind him. It was a
long time before I was able to obey him.
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PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:50 am

Melanie woke me up the next morning when she arrived. "Don't tell me I actually got
here before you were up!" she chirped by way of greeting. "What's the matter,
sleepyhead, not up before the sun for once?" I blinked up at her as she lifted me out of
the crib and onto the dresser for my morning change. She seemed upset to see that I'd
gotten a rash from being in a wet diaper all night, and ran to get some ointment from the
bathroom. Afterward, she dressed me in a little pink dress and tied a ribbon around my
tail, telling me that since It'd warmed up a bit we'd be going to the park today after
breakfast. I was happy to hear I'd get to leave this house for a while, and also that I'd get
to see some of Lycaon up close instead of from my window. However, I was still
brooding on last night and it showed. "What's the matter, honey?" Melanie asked,
stroking my head as she sat me in my highchair. "You haven't spoken all morning." I
smiled at her. "I'm okay, mommy. Just thinking." I wasn't willing to talk here in the
kitchen with everyone else around. Also, I wasn't sure I could confide in Melanie, since
she was obviously reporting our conversations to the director. Maybe I was being foolish,
but I still thought she was okay. I couldn't believe that the woman who was fast
becoming my 'mommy' in more than title was evil.

Dana and Sammy were also dressed to go out. As I ate my breakfast (scrambled
eggs and juice) I watched Sammy closely. Try as I might, I couldn't figure out what the
director was talking about when he said Sammy wasn't ready to go home yet. If I didn't
know the truth, I wouldn't believe for a second that he was anything other then a very
young puppy. Of course, I had to remind myself, everyone in Lycaon would know the
truth, since transitioning was only allowed for legal adults. You had to be over 18 to sign
the paperwork.

Once breakfast was over, we got buttoned into our coats, our mommies got our
diaper bags together and we were placed in our strollers to go outside. The air was still a
bit chilly, but not nearly as cold as the night I arrived. I was also in a black wool coat and
under my blanket, so I felt fairly comfortable. We walked down the hill toward town, and
I couldn't wait to get my first view of Lycaon up close.

As we approached town more furs were milling around the streets. We passed
though a market, and several of them stopped us to look and coo about how adorable we
were. I'd thought I'd be embarrassed, but in truth I found myself loving the attention. I
smiled up at them and giggled when they talked babyishly to me.

Eventually we got to the park. Our mommies unpacked a blanket and sat down to
watch us as we scampered around playing. I waited again until they were out of earshot
and then paused to compose my thoughts. I signaled to Dana to come over to me. I had a
lot to talk to her about, and this time she was going to listen whether she wanted to or not.

Dana came over to me with an excited grin on her face. I felt bad that I was
probably about to ruin her trip to the park, but I had to tell her what had happened. "What
are you doing over here, Cynthia? Me and Sammy are going to go check out the river.
It's frozen solid!" She said the last part in awe, as if a frozen river were some miracle of
nature. Of course, to a toddler's mind it probably was. "Listen, Dana. I know you don't
want to talk about this, but I have got to tell you something." The childlike look fell out
of her eyes at once, and she opened her mouth to speak. I cut her off before she could say
anything. "No, just listen for a minute. Last night I went downstairs..." As quickly as I
could I related everything that had happened in the director's office, as well as all the
things I had been wondering about. When I finished, we stood in silence for a moment.
Dana looked away from me before speaking; "Why are you doing this, Cynthia? Can't
you just be a good girl?" My mouth fell open in shock. "You can't be serious Dana?
You don't want to know what's going on?" "I'm a little curious." she admitted, looking
up resentfully. "But look, we've got what we came here for. We get to be children, and
furs. We get parents to look after us. Why are you risking that? Just leave it alone!" She
shouted the last part at me causing our mommies to look over. We stared back at them,
having forgotten that they were even there for a moment. Stephanie waved us over to the
blanket where Sammy was sitting with the others, eating a cookie. Dana ran off without
saying anything more to me. After a few seconds I followed.

When I got over to the blanket I heard Stephanie asking Dana why she was yelling
at me. "Oh, that was nothing, mommy. Me and Cynthia were just playing a game. I
nodded enthusiastically, grateful that she hadn't told on me despite her obvious
disagreement with my snooping. Sammy looked up at us with his ears laid back, clearly
hurt that we were playing without him. I sat down next to him. "Hey, Sammy! Dana
said you guys were going to check out the river!" Sammy nodded with his mouth full of
cookie and his tail wagging frantically. Katie wrapped her arms around him protectively.
"I don't know if you guys should be playing down by the river. It might be dangerous."
Sammy's face fell, and Dana looked up at her sadly too. "Aunt Katie's right, you guys."
Melanie jumped in, "Just because it's mostly frozen doesn't mean you can't fall through
one of the soft spots. Plus we won't be able to see you from here." Sammy started to cry
and for no particular reason I found myself tearing up to. What was this? I hadn't even
really wanted to go, but now that I couldn't I was crying over it? The realization that I
was losing control of my emotions again pushed me over the edge. I clutched Melanie
tightly and began sobbing into her chest.

"Oh, come on you two." Stephanie said in a consoling tone, "I'm sure we can all
go down there together later. Then you can see the river, and we old fuddy-duddies can
feel safe, right ladies?" She looked at Katie and Melanie with an amused grin on her
face. Dana giggled and both Sammy and I stopped crying and smiled at her. "I think
that's a great idea." said Melanie and Katie nodded too. "Why don't you three stay near
us until lunch, and then after we eat we'll all go over there together?" Sammy sprang up
and ran into the grass shouting "Cynthia's it! Cynthia's it!" Dana ran off giggling and I
chased after her futility (it's almost impossible to catch a rabbit when she's got a head
start). For the rest of the morning I completely forgot my worries.

We left in early afternoon, just before naptime. We'd had a picnic lunch and, as
promised, checked out the frozen river which had indeed begun to thaw on this unusually
warm day. I was actually looking forward to my nap after missing half a night's sleep and
having played outdoors all morning. Melanie had to carry me upstairs because I'd begun
to doze off on the walk home.

I was dreaming again. I stood in a courtroom, before a tribunal. Up above me sat
Dana, Melanie and, in the middle, higher then the others, Winston, the orphanage
director. I was in chains and beside me sat Sammy, who was similarly chained. Sammy
leaned towards me. "Just give up. You don't want to test your luck, I did and look at
me." I looked at closely, but saw nothing unusual. "It's on the inside." he said sadly,
It's always on the inside that they hurt you." he began crying. I looked up at the tribunal
in fear. Winston leaned over his podium, clutching the sides like an angry preacher, and
scowled down at me. "You stand accused of disobeying your mother and father, and
showing a distinct lack of gratitude for all you've been given!" he shouted at me. "How
do you propose to redeem yourself?" I opened my mouth to respond but before I could
Dana began shouting. "I saw her! I heard her! She confessed everything! She tried to
corrupt me too, but I resisted!" She leaned back in her chair, looking smugly satisfied. I
looked over at Melanie, but she just shook her head sadly, tears in her eyes. "Well? Have
you nothing to say for yourself?" I looked up at Winston, trembling in fear. "I...I'm
sorry." I meeped. "I was just scared, that's all. I was only scared." I began crying. "That
won't work. I tried that already." said Sammy sadly. "I guess you'll be joining me then.
At least I won't be the only one." "Silence!" shouted Winston "You aren't the first or the
last! I will determine who's guiltily or not! And now I pronounce verdict!" I stood there
trembling. "I find the defendant, one Cynthia... Cynthia....

I never got to hear my verdict because Melanie woke me up at that very moment.
"Come on dear, if I let you sleep any longer you'll never get to bed tonight." she said
gently. I was lifted out of my crib and, still clutching Edward and trembling slightly, I
was carried to the dresser for a diaper change. As I was wiped clean, powdered and
rediapered, I thought through what I would do next. Dana was clearly not on my side,
which left me pretty much alone if I wanted to pursue this any further. Part of me wanted
to leave well enough alone, part of me wanted to confide everything to Melanie, and part
of me wanted to rescue Sammy somehow. The trouble was, I'd never be satisfied with the
first one, I wasn't sure how safe the second one was, and I had no idea how to go about
the last one. I was still sorting through my options when Melanie picked me up and
carried me downstairs for dinner.

I sat pondering my troubles as Melanie fed me. I finally concluded that there was
nothing more I could do without jeopardizing myself further, which could lead to the loss
of my mind. Upon reflection, I wasn't really sure the director could do to me what he
implied he'd done to Sammy. As Dana had pointed out, it could be that Sammy was just
a natural regressor. He may just have the ability to section off the parts of his memory
associated with his old life. But I wasn't ready to bet everything on that. The director had
frightened me with all his talk about me and Sammy being alike, and possibly treatable in
the same ways.

So I decided to play along, keeping my head down. I'd keep my eyes and ears
open for anything that might help me, and continue watching Melanie to see if she could
be trusted. I really hoped I could talk to her about all this, but she just hadn't been
receptive the first time around.

The next several days passed in a blur. We had a pretty set routine: wake up,
breakfast, playtime, lunch, naptime, playtime, dinner, bath, quiet time, bed. There were
no more trips out of the house. The weather was still cold, which was to be expected
since I was pretty sure it was still January. Or maybe it was now February? I really didn't
know anymore, there were no calendars or clocks to be found in the orphanage. My time
wasn't divided into days, hours and minutes but into events. It was time to eat, or time to
play, or time for a change...

Which is probably why I was caught off guard one morning when, after breakfast,
Melanie told me we weren't going to go play, but were going to see the director again.
"You've been here three weeks now, " she said, "It's time to review your progress." She
led me by the paw through the playroom and into the hall. I really wished she'd pick me
up, but she didn't. Barring that I wished I had Edward, or my blankie, but I'd left both
upstairs in my crib. My stomach clenched as Melanie knocked on the door to the
director's office and I heard the familiar voice calling "enter".
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Poco

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Number of posts : 856
Localisation : High in the Rocky Mountains
Registration date : 2007-03-11

PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:52 am

As we went into the room I realized I'd hardly seen Winston at all in the past couple of
weeks. He looked somewhat more careworn then the night I'd confronted him, and he'd
turned the tables so effortlessly. Still, when our eyes met, I felt a chill run through me
and I was grateful when Melanie picked me up and sat me on her lap, facing away from
the lynx.

I looked over my shoulder, scanning Winston's desk for any sign of the NRP
documents I'd seen last time I was in here. The desk was empty except for a file bearing
my name, which he casually flipped open as he and Melanie began talking about me. I
half listened to them as I looked at the papers inside. I gathered that they seemed pleased
with my progress, both in acting more like the toddler I was supposed to be and in ceasing
my constant stream of questions. Satisfied, I leaned in closer to my file in an attempt to
read what was written there.

Strange. It seemed to be written in a foreign language. But no...I could recognize
some of the words. There was my name; "Cynthia" and "mouse" yes, I knew that one.
There were a couple other words I could read as well, but the rest...it was unidentifiable.
I knew the letters, but not the words. This was crazy. I began to sound them out to
myself. "Pr...Prog...ress...Progress! Re...por...Report. Progress Report!" I said
excitedly. There, I could read it! Odd that I'd been having trouble. I suddenly realized
that Melanie and Winston had fallen silent and were staring at me.

"What are you doing, honey?" Melanie asked, turning me so I faced her now.
"I...I couldn't read the writing at first." I replied after a moment's pause. "I had to sound
it out." I looked over my shoulder at Winston, who was wearing a very satisfied smile. I
realized I'd tipped my hand to him unwittingly. "Well of course you couldn't read it,
Cynthia. You're too young. You shouldn't be reading at all!" Melanie said with a hint of
exasperation. She sighed. "You were doing so well, too." "Now, now Melanie." said
Winston in his fatherly voice, "Don't be so hard on young Cynthia here. She's been so
much better lately, I think you'll agree. And the fact that she's losing her ability to read by
sight shows that she's stopped resisting, don't you think?" "You're right, Winston. I'm
sorry Cynthia, that was mean of me to get mad at you. I keep forgetting how hard all this
is." I stared back at her with my mouth open in surprise. What the heck were they
talking about? I'd stopped resisting what? What exactly would I have to resist to become
literate again? I knew better than to ask, especially here. I soon realized how much this
setback would affect my ability to gather information. If I couldn't read documents I
couldn't find out what Winston was up to with the NRP or search for records of what he'd
done to Sammy (if anything). I had the feeling time was growing short.

Shortly after that Melanie took me back out to the playroom. She changed me and
then, with a playful pat on the bum, she sent me over to Sammy and Dana before retiring
to the couch with Katie and Stephanie. We played with the doll house, me and Dana
making a domestic scene and Sammy suddenly jumping in with a dinosaur attack, or
something. It was totally silly and totally fun. I realized I wanted this more then
anything. I decided I'd confront Melanie with my questions one last time and if it got me
nowhere I'd just let it go. There were worse fates, right?

So, when Melanie took me upstairs for a story before naptime, I began asking her
questions. I started small. "Mommy? How old am I?" Melanie looked at me in surprise
for a moment. "Well. I guess that depends on your point of view, sweetie. Why do you
ask?" "I just wanted to know. I'm supposed to act like my age. But I'm not sure what
that is." Melanie thought about this. "I'd say you're about two. Maybe two and a half.
You can walk and talk. You can't use the potty. Or read." She fixed me with a
meaningful stare for a moment. "Come on, up on my lap." She patted her knee and
opened the book she'd selected for us.

Before she could start reading I asked my next question. I'd nestled back in the
crook of her arm so I could look up at her face. "Mommy? I was wondering. How
come I could read before, but not now?" I tried to put my best innocent look on but
Melanie still seemed suspicious. There was a very long pause where she just stared at
me. Finally she said: "Because before you were an adult, and now you're my baby." She
looked at me meaningfully. I couldn't help but notice her choice of words: 'my baby' not
'a baby'. She was obviously reminding me of the talk we'd had about my duty to her as
my caretaker. That made me uncomfortable, as it had clearly been meant to. Still I
pressed on.

"Is that why I can't understand so many things? Why I'm so confused and
forgetful?" "Probably Cynthia." She sounded exasperated. Then she calmed down and
smiled. "Just relax, baby. Let it go. You need to learn to just be what you are." She
began to stroke my ears gently. "You're doing so well. I'm proud of you, but you can do
better if you'll just stop questioning everything." I felt myself relaxing, wanting to do as
my mommy told me. She smiled and opened the book again. I suddenly sat up again.

"Wait!" She seemed taken aback by my sudden interruption. "Wait. I'm sorry
mommy, I just have one more question." She sighed. "Well, what is it then?" "When
can we go home? Sammy and Dana have been here forever. I'm scared I won't get to go
either." She relaxed visibly. "Dana is going home soon. Stephanie told me they'd be
leaving in a few days." I felt very sad about this. Despite our disagreement Dana had
become a good friend. "And Sammy?" I asked, not even looking up at her. She held me
close, seeing my sadness. "Don't worry, Sammy isn't going anywhere." "How come?"
"Shh...enough questions, Cynthia. You've talked all through story time. Let's take your
nap now." She carried me over to my crib and tucked me in. As she leaned in to kiss me
I asked one last question. "Mommy? When will I get to go home? You never said."
"When you're ready, Cynthia. I don't know, but it's not time yet." With that she turned
off the lights and left.

I lay back and reflected on what I'd learned. It wasn't much, but I was gratified that
at last Melanie had answered some of my questions. I just hoped that she wasn't running
off to the director's office to report our conversation. Somehow, I didn't think she was.
With that in mind I drifted off to sleep.

I woke up as I felt someone grasping my wrists. Confused, I realized I wasn't in
my room anymore, but in what looked like a doctor's office. The person holding on to me
was Melanie, who seemed to be tying my paws to a padded table. I opened my mouth to
protest, but she shushed me gently. "Just hold still, honey. This will only take a minute."
She finished tying down my arms and moved over to my feet. I began to struggle, but
then froze in fear as Winston entered the room.

"Well, well, Cynthia. Sorry to disturb your nap, but we thought it best to get you
down here while you were sleeping. It will be less stressful all around this way." Down
here? Where was I exactly? I started to ask, but again Melanie shushed me. She was
finished with my legs and began to stroke my tummy. I noticed my pajamas had been
removed and I wore only a diaper. I looked up at her in terror, and saw that she looked
unhappy too.

"Well, Cynthia, it has been decided that you need a little help moving on."
Winston began, "You just don't seem to be adjusting. Normally we only administer this
in your meals, and in much smaller doses." As he spoke he drew out a syringe from his
jacket pocket and removed the cap. "But occasionally, we are forced to increase the
dosage for difficult cases." He smiled down at me. "Is this..." I began, but found myself
unable to finish the question. "Yes Cynthia, it is." Melanie answered, looking down at
me with sympathy. "Don't worry, it won't hurt." She fell silent again. Looking at her I
saw she was crying a little.

"Yes, it will be quite painless. And to answer your question more completely, this
is indeed what we gave your friend Samuel. Although you will receive a slightly smaller
dose." He gave me a mock bow. "It seems he had a bit too much, which is why he's still
here, under observation."

"Stop it!" Melanie shouted, startling us both. "Can't you see you're scaring her?"
I felt a rush of gratitude. Melanie cradled my head in her arms and glared at Winston.
"Well, she certainly shouldn't be afraid." Winston said silkily after a pause. "After all,
this medicine was made by our mutual friends. Someone we've all already entrusted our
safety to. Besides," he added, looking down at me, "you've been taking this at a lower
dosage for more than a month, every time you eat." I was floored. Melanie had been
preparing my meals, which meant she had been giving me this medicine. I felt betrayed.
All this time. The confusion, the regression. She had known exactly what it was.

Winston approached me with the syringe held ready. Melanie whispered into my
ear: "Just close your eyes, Cynthia. Just look away." I ignored her, glaring up at
Winston, who looked so smug in his victory. He stuck the needle into my arm and
depressed the plunger. I felt a cold liquid entering my veins and a moment later there was
a metallic taste in my throat. Then I got a little light-headed. I felt peaceful. Looking up
I saw Melanie releasing the straps that held me to the table. She picked me up and
redressed me. All through this I said nothing. I felt totally calm. It was as if nothing had
happened. Melanie cradled me in her arms and carried me upstairs. As we went, I
actually dozed off, feeling content.

The feeling of euphoria lasted through the night. I remember little of those hours
except that I didn't rejoin Sammy and Dana, instead I spent the whole evening with
Melanie, up in my room. We played some simple games like peek-a-boo and "this little
piggy." At one point she read to me, and while I couldn't really follow the simple
children's story, I enjoyed the sound of her voice, and the pictures in the book.
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Poco

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Number of posts : 856
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PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:52 am

The next morning I awoke in my crib. My head still felt a bit foggy, and I wasn't sure
what exactly was going on. Standing up, I realized I was wearing a sodden diaper. For
some reason, my first response was to cry. Melanie came rushing in. "Oh, sweetie. Here
let's get you changed. She picked me up and undressed me, then carried me into the
bathroom for my bath.

Now, why had I cried like that? I wondered as she washed my fur. I was still
having trouble thinking clearly. I vaguely remembered the incident yesterday, where I'd
been given the shot. What had Winston said? Something about NRP, and Sammy...

"Still a little groggy, huh?" Melanie asked, interrupting my thoughts. I nodded. I
also remembered being angry with her about something. But what could Melanie have
done to tick me off? I loved her.

"This first shot won't help you much, long term. It takes a few to build up in your
system. But we can't do another for a few days, or you'll overdose, just like..." She
trailed off, seeming to catch herself. She quickly looked away, suddenly becoming very
interested in my toy boat. "Just like...?" I asked, struggling to concentrate on the topic at
hand, instead of the little tug boat she was sailing around my body. "Toot, toot." She
said with a grin, doing a circuit around my feet. I giggled, quickly losing my train of
thought.

Over the course of the day I regained myself little by little. During breakfast and
morning playtime I was very childlike. For the first time ever Melanie had to clean up my
face and clothes after a meal. I just couldn't stay focused on eating, wanting instead to see
everything going on around me. The result was my turning away from the spoonfuls of
food heading for my face. Melanie just laughed, and wiped me clean with my bib.

After my nap, though, I had regained enough of my memory to recall the previous
day's events a little more clearly. I remembered now about the medicine in the food. I
decided I wasn't going to go along with this anymore. I said nothing during playtime, and
was unable to help myself from joining in enthusiastically. In fact, for the first time ever I
seemed to relate better to Sammy than Dana.

Soon enough, it was lunch time. Melanie puttered around the kitchen making
lunch with the other mommies. I watched them closely, trying to catch them at putting
the medicine in the food. Their backs were to us, however, so I couldn't see clearly what
was going on. Melanie came over with a bowl of soup and began trying to feed me. I
simply sat there, glaring at her with my mouth clenched. "Uh, oh." Katie laughed,
"Someone's being fussy." I fixed her with a glare. She knew what was going on. She'd
been in on Sammy's undoing. I didn't drop my gaze until she looked away.

"Cynthia, please." Melanie whispered, "Don't do this." I stared at her stricken
face. I felt a pang of guilt at her look of anguish, but held firm. She sighed. "Excuse us."
She said to the others, and carried me out of the room.

I half expected her to take me directly to Winston's office, but we passed right by
in and went out onto the front porch instead. This startled me since I'd rarely been
outside since arriving here. The day was nice, not really warm, but not too cold either.
She sat us down on a chair in the sun.

We said nothing for a long while, just sitting and enjoying being outside. Finally
she spoke. "So, you're not going to eat now?" I looked away from her, staying silent. "I
know you're mad at me, and I don't blame you." I still didn't speak. Her words were
painful because she was obviously so hurt by my actions, but I couldn't let her break me.
She sighed again. We resumed our silence for a bit. Finally she spoke again. "I didn't
want to bring this up, but you're going to get the drug whether you eat or not." I looked at
her. Was she threatening me?

I thought about the horrible innocence of this scene. Any passer-by would see a
young mother and her child sitting on the porch in the afternoon sunshine, and be
blissfully unaware of the drama unfolding here. I wanted to scream. I wanted to leap off
Melanie's lap and run away across the lawn to anywhere at all. Lycaon proper would do.
Just hide out among the other oddities living there and never come near this place again.
Instead I continued staring at Melanie in stunned silence.

"It's not my decision, you know." She said a little defensively, as if reading my
thoughts. "I didn't have much say in any of this." I stared at her for a moment. "So it
was Winston?" I asked finally, breaking my silence for the first time since before lunch.
She nodded. "I have no choice." She explained, "If you don't eat I'll have to give you an
injection instead. If I refuse to go along with it I don't get to keep you. He'll find
someone else who will." I felt myself tearing up at the thought of having to go through
all of this without Melanie. I nodded. "Okay." I whispered. "Okay, I'll eat then." We
sat for a few minutes longer, and then went inside to finish our lunch.

The kitchen was mercifully empty when we reentered it. The others had finished
eating and moved on to playtime. Melanie reheated the soup in the microwave while I sat
watching her, thinking about the situation I found myself in. For the first time since
arriving I realized my old motto of 'while at least I volunteered for this' wasn't true
anymore. I hadn't volunteered to surrender my mind, just my body. I hadn't agreed to
give up my freedom of choice, only my responsibility. But volunteered or not, I had little
choice but to go along. I couldn't resist, or I'd lose my best friend, and still get the
treatments. I couldn't run away, really. Where would I go? Lycaon wasn't a realistic
place to hide. It wasn't a large enough town, all they had to do is ask: 'Hey, anyone seen a
little white mouse child?' What were the odds there was more then one like me in town?
And leaving the city was an even worse idea. I'd be a freak among the humans. No, I
was stuck here.

The microwave dinged, indicating that my thinking time was up. Melanie came
over with the bowl of medicine-laced soup. She held the spoon up to my mouth. I
hesitated, even though I'd already made up my mind. She said nothing, but when I looked
up into her eyes I saw her pleading with me, and I knew I had to do it. I accepted the food
from her without complaint, eating every bite. When I was finished, the light-headedness
returned just a little. It would probably take a much larger dose to bring back the full-
blown regression of last night.

I didn't feel much like playing, so we went back upstairs and just sat around in my
room for a bit. Eventually, Melanie suggested a story, and I agreed mostly for her. She
seemed as depressed as I was. I was beginning to understand that I was her closest friend
too. As she was reading I looked at the words in the book and discovered that I couldn't
even sound them out anymore. I'd assumed that I had regained all my prior mental
capacity, but I guess there was some permanent damage. Or would it come back if I
stopped the treatments? It didn't really matter, since I wasn't going to stop anyhow.

That realization stunned me for a moment. For the first time since coming here, I
had no confusion about the future. I was going to take the treatments and then I was
going to go live with Melanie. That was it. I didn't need to worry about anything else. I
had uncovered the answers to all my questions: Sammy was the way he was because he'd
taken the same medicine I was taking. He was happy and I guess I would be too. The
confusion and unwilling regression I had been experiencing were due to the smaller doses
of that same medicine being slipped into my food. Winston was in contact with the NRP
because he was testing their "products" on us. It all made sense.

"Cynthia? Are you all right, honey?" I looked up at Melanie, who was staring at
me with a look of concern. "Yes, why?" I asked. "You just had the strangest expression.
Like you were in shock or something." I smiled at her. "I kinda was, but I think I'm okay
now." I snuggled up to her and fell asleep listening to the story she was reading. I really
was okay after all. I was Melanie's little girl.
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Zee-Zee

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Age : 40
Localisation : Zee-Zee's house
Registration date : 2007-04-22

PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 12:36 pm

Nice story, Poco! I've read it before, but I don't think I've ever commented. I like it!

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Prav

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Number of posts : 445
Age : 27
Localisation : Who knows!
Registration date : 2007-04-19

PostSubject: Re: A reposting of an old story   Wed Jul 04, 2007 12:58 pm

I haven't read it yet, I'm going to tonight, but I was wondering, could you make the paragraphs a little smaller? It makes it easier to read!
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