My (Rather Painful) Twelve Days of Christmas Rendition.

My (Rather Painful) Twelve Days of Christmas Rendition.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me one kick in the nuts!
On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the fourth day of Christmas my true love to me four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me five bone breaking blows! Four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me six stabbings, five bone breaking blows! Four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me seven raging knees to the abdomen, six stabbings, five bone breaking blows! Four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me eight bites from her dog fluffy, seven raging knees to the abdomen, six stabbings, five bone breaking blows! Four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me nine beatings with an axe handle, eight bites from her dog fluffy, seven raging knees to the abdomen, six stabbings, five bone breaking blows! Four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me ten roundhouses, nine beatings with an axe handle, eight bites from her dog fluffy, seven raging knees to the abdomen, six stabbings, five bone breaking blows! Four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me eleven hard elbows, ten roundhouses, nine beatings with an axe handle, eight bites from her dog fluffy, seven raging knees to the abdomen, six stabbings, five bone breaking blows! Four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!
On the twelve day of Christmas my truly unstable love gave to me twelve attempts at rape, eleven hard elbows, ten roundhouses, nine beatings with an axe handle, eight bites from her dog fluffy, seven raging knees to the abdomen, six stabbings, five bone breaking blows! Four bitch slaps, three sprays of pepper spray, two punches in the stomach, and one kick in the nuts!

(The maker of this alteration would have liked to say thank you for your time, and also would have wished you a merry Christmas, but sadly his psychotic wife did him in mere moments after the completion of this song).


(And yes I know it's way early, but I would rather it be early then late like my Halloween story).

I was wincing from day one. Funny as this is... I can only say OUCH! *huggles the batty* No worries on the early bro. Walmart is already getting ready for Christmas. they even have footed sleepers with Rudolph in the adult women's department. Nothing for men's though! *grumbles and rolls his eyes*

no fear, christmas comes earlier every year, before ya know it, ppl will be preparing for christmas the day after christmas

but i do hafta admit it was a painful twelve days

Hehehe. Like I said last night on the messenger I love this. Hehe. Very nice job Chimour. ^^

Riolu wrote:

I was wincing from day one. Funny as this is... I can only say OUCH! *huggles the batty* No worries on the early bro. Walmart is already getting ready for Christmas. they even have footed sleepers with Rudolph in the adult women's department. Nothing for men's though! *grumbles and rolls his eyes*

hey I work at Walmart sorry that you couldn't find the sleepers in mens buddy. and Riolu that was too funny. my gut kind of hurts (just kidding) from just reading all the stuff that happened in that song. that is too funny. oh and 102.1 the radio station I listen to during the Christmas season is already playing Christmas songs *grumble grumble* but at least you won't be doing this over and over and over like they do for the next 2 stinking months now. so no worries buddy.